Good wishes aren't always good wishes

Granted, but now you have no happy days and only hard times.
I wish I had art skills.
Granted, you change your name to SporksMarioWiki.

I wish to be the king and queen of cheese.
Granted, but the evil prince of pepper jack eats everything, and the common cheese people pull a coup d'etat, locking you in a giant cheese wheel for the rest of your life

I wish for an anchovy pizza