Good wishes aren't always good wishes

[Sammy/Sammi]

it is granted however, the wishes go bad
I wish I can fly with a wing cap

 

[Carissa]

Granted but it's extremely uncomfortable to wear

I wish I got to see the Wonderbolts perform from a front row seat!

 

[Power Flotzo]

Granted. They get into an argument before the performance starts and immediately disband.

I wish for a new custom mouse pad.

 

[Primarina]

Granted but it's in your most hated color. I wish to end world hunger

 

[Sammy/Sammi]

Granted, but you starve yourself to death MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I WISH I HAD A YOSHI AS A PET!

 

[BMfan08]

Granted, it has an obsession of eating you (at least you'll know how a meatball feels...)

I wish I had the energy to do more things.

 

[Hatsune Miku]

Granted, You Has Low energy

I wish I Need Miku to appearance IN MY Palette Swap Section the Story Without Text

 

[Cloudwalker]

Granted, but your sections ends that issue.

I wish for the world to be a better place

 

[Fizzle]

Granted, but the world is an even better place for your worst enemy.

I wish I understood coding.

 

[Hint Toad]

Granted, but now video games seem less impressive to you.

I wish to play rock paper scissors.

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, I win against you every time.

I wish to be turned into an Eevee-transformed Ditto, or at least a Totodile.

 

[Primarina]

Granted but other Pokémon hate you. I wish to be a TAS master.

 

[Sammy/Sammi]

Granted, however, you lose every time
I wish to meet Charles M.

 

[Zdrmonster Productions]

Granted, but I don't know which Charles M. so you'll have to decide via gambling.

I wish for a dual-screen GNU/Linux handheld similar in form factor to a DSi XL, so give me a model name.