A big part of me wants to theme myself as an item for the next month, but I might have to wait on that since June is pride month and I like to flex my gayness while I can.
If I had a nickel for every person I know on the internet whose initials are NS where the S stands for Squid, I would have two nickels. Which isn't much, but it's weird that there's two of them.
I've lived with obnoxious neighbors for years and I'm over it. My goal in life is to live in a place where I don't share a single wall with someone I don't know.
So I've been thinking about it and I think cutting myself off from a source of socialization when loneliness is one of my biggest struggles isn't really helping much. Because of that, I'm going to keep hanging around here, even if it's just having the tab open in the background to check every once in a while.
As for my mental health, it's still just as bad as ever. I've been struggling with poor mental health since like, March at this point and it's very tiring.
So, bad news. My mental health has gotten to the lowest point it's ever been at in the past five and a half years. Because of that, I'm going to have to dip again while I try to recover it. That being said though, my ten year forumversary is coming up in a week and I'm not going to miss that.
Wish me luck in my battle against depression. I'm losing pretty hard right now but I want to turn it around and kick my depression in the balls.
I just love how at the same time YouTube started banning adblockers, they also started allowing 36 seconds worth of unskippable ads before videos. Great job YouTube, I'm sure that will make everyone love you so much.
I want so bad to make Mario Kart custom content but I know I don't have the patience to teach myself how to do it even if I watch a bunch of tutorials. I have such a bad case of gorilla brain that always needs instant gratification.
I told my ex about the 7/29/95 build of Mario 64 and suddenly the bulb in my lamp started flickering a little. Maybe all the warnings about not researching it were right.
Just beat a new hardest in GD in only 748 attempts. I started it last night and put in about 647 attempts, then did a practice run as a refresher today and then just kinda plowed through it. I'm really happy with how I've actually been getting better at GD.
My brain: Hey, remember that stupid thing you did like four months ago that made you look like a stupid dumb idiot? That was a great memory, wasn't it? I'm going to keep thinking about it incessantly for the next 30 minutes and you can't do anything about it.
Even though I keep telling myself that the mobile version of this website is terrible and doesn't entirely work half the time, I still keep using it on my phone and I think I need to stop. Doesn't help that I have a bit of a problem with social media addiction and keep bringing myself back on here when I know I should be doing other things, so I'm going to do my best to only be on here on my computer from now on. Wish me luck.
I'm so proud of myself. I was fighting severe mental health issues all semester and yet I made it into my sophomore year with a GPA of 3.7, and finished this semester with three A's and a B.
My neighbors have gotten so loud all the time that they kept me up until 5:00 AM and woke me up at 9:30. I'm currently in a really bad mood and it's such a problem that I had to tell my landlord.
I hate Twitter but if there's anything I miss about it, it's how it was a good place to write down my random thoughts and minor complaints without feeling like I'd be annoying for posting a few hours apart. Sometimes I like to be vocal about whatever I'm thinking about, no matter how stupid it is and Twitter is great for that. I wish there were another platform that weren't as much of a hellhole as Twitter where I could say my random nonsense to people who might be willing to listen on occasion.
Crazy how you can get emotions over not only memories you have, but also memories you don't have. I've been thinking about how being an only child with emotionally distant parents caused me to grow up feeling isolated, made even worse by my mom never letting me go to public school. I never got to do anything fun with them at home and therefore didn't develop fond memories of growing up. It feels like I missed out on a true childhood and now that I'm an adult, I can see just how much I wish I had that.
So anyway, all those thoughts came from listening to Wii Sports bowling music.
Basically, I've been dealing with the stress of college and deteriorating mental health and haven't been inclined to check in here lately. Well, I just finished with my last final a couple hours ago so I thought I'd drop in and let everyone know I'm okay. I probably won't be going back to activity very much, but I'm glad to be done with my freshman year of college after this much time.
My mom committed a felony update #2: the money has been returned to my account, except for $45 that's unaccounted for. I'll probably still take all my money and move it to a new bank account that she doesn't have control of though.