Good wishes aren't always good wishes

[LN1]

Granted, now a simple piece of bread is worth $999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999 so you don't have enough money even with the bill.

I wish I had a good idea for a wish.

 

[Marstar2000]

Granted. You think so hard you explode.

I wish for the most valuable thing in the world that would never get lost.

 

[Nabber]

Granted, it's a boulder.

I wished I was Andrew Hussie.

 

[Marstar2000]

Granted. The real Andrew Hussie gets very confused, and eventually calls the police.

I wish I wasn't holding my breath right now.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, you let go of your breath, it hits the ground, and it breaks.
I wish these ponies didn't drive me to drink.

 

[Marstar2000]

Granted. They are so mad they throw you off a cliff.

I wish for L33T code.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted,

L33T

.

I wish that I weren't in Kansas anymore.

 

[Nabber]

Granted, you're in hell.

I wish I went to heaven.

 

[LN1]

Granted, you go to "heaven", which is actually a place in which they torture you which is unfittingly named.

I wish to fire mah lazer(misspelled on purpose)

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, Mah Lazer has been fired (too bad, she was a good worker).

I wish that David Beckham broke up with Spice.

 

[Nabber]

Granted, he gets together with Posh Spice.

I wish for my mafia to get stickied.

 

[RandomYoshi]

Granted, but it's locked before it gets stickied, disallowing the game to even begin.

I wish for something good to happen for me.

 

[Nabber]

Granted, you live one second longer than you originally would have.

I wish to die a painless death.

 

[LN1]

Granted, it's painless, but then you're revived and re-killed, except this time it's at least 9001 times more painful than it would have originally have been if you hadn't wished that.

I wish for easy.

 

[Nabber]

Granted, it's easy failure and you get humiliated.

I wish that the end to Skyward Sword was more impressive.

 

[LN1]

Granted, it's so impressive you literally explode and die whether you're immortal or not.

I wish for laser.

 

[Nabber]

Granted, it blows up your face.

I wish to beat the Impossible Quiz.

 

[LN1]

Granted, you get a bad prize, you are promised a much, much better prize if you do it again, you get to The Epic 10, and they are harder than they originally were, you get a Game Over that literally kills you.

I wish for

 

[Nabber]

Granted, he eats you.

I wish for a cat.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, but Pokemon Trainer Red eats the cat.

I wish that Rudnicki would fall in love with the person below me.

 

[Nabber]

Granted, but together we take the wiki for ourselves and you all become our slaves.

I wish for ultimate power.

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, you get the Ultimate Power Glove, which is so big, you can't hold it up, and it crushes you.

I wish for a / slash fic.

 

[Nabber]

Granted, it's horrifying.

I wish Gamzee wasn't so popular./

 

[User4042]

Granted, but Pokemon Trainer Red eats the cat.

...
...
...
...
...
...
...

Granted, Gamzee dies a painful death.

I wish Chikorita was real

 

[Magikrazy]

Granted, but Pokemon Trainer Red eats the cat.

...
...
...
...
...
...
...

Granted, Gamzee dies a painful death.

I wish Chikorita was real

I was referencing the Pancakes and Waffles thread.

Granted, but you accidentally eat him.
I wish Wile E. Coyote could finally get the Roadrunner.