Favorite TV Quotes

"You're not a bad person. Horses are bad people."

-Peter Griffin

"I gotta find that bitch or son-of-a-bitch and give him or her a piece of my mind or penis."

-Peter Griffin
 
"I didn't get to study much last night.

I, on the other hand, studied my brains out last night.

How long did you study?

A whole four hours.

A whole four hours!

What the?" - (in order) Kagami, Konata, Miyuki, Kagami and Konata (at same time), Kagami and Konata (at same time), Lucky Star
 
Marge: "Oh, my special little guy!" *kisses Bart*

Homer: "Oh, I'm glad you smell like hot dogs!" *kisses Bart*
 
Primal Dialga said:
What is his power level!? *Breaks Glasses* IT'S OVER 9000!!!
If you're going to quote that, at least get the quote right.

"Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level?

IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAND!"

Also,

"Why is it every time I kiss my wife a child pops up?" Cliff Huxtable, The Cosby Show
 
"Do you, Bartholomew J. Simpson, take Mary Wrestlemania Spuckler as your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do."

"And since we don't need to hear from womenfolk-"
 
"I wish I could menstruate. If I could menstruate, I wouldn’t have to deal with idiotic calendars anymore. I’d just be able to count down from my previous cycle. Plus I’d be more in tune with the moon and the tide." -Dwight Schrute, the one and only
 
"Nichol scores, and he's off the schneid too! It's a schneid-buster night!"

-Sharks broadcaster Randy Hahn, during a 9-1 win over Calgary
 
"Bowling for Soup.

Eh, before their time" - Phineas, Phineas and Ferb

Yes! That is Fire Dedede!
I can't make that sound cool...” - Meta Knight, Hoshi no Kaabii Ep. 49

"I love you." - Patrick, SpongeBob
 
"Mr. Griffin, we're going to have to ban you from the poop deck section of the ship for the rest of the voyage."

"It is called the poop deck. That is why I pooped there."

"You're disgusting!"

"You're misleading!"
 
"Are your egos so big, that you can't see past your noses!?"

~Kami, Dragon Ball Z
 
Peter Griffin: "$5,000? I could use that money to buy a cave and then put it in the front yard and tell people not to go in there!"
 
"There are three things that I absolutely refuse to tolerate: Cowardice, bad haircuts, and military inserrection. It is most unfortunate that our friend, Vegeta, posseses all three of these."

~Frieza, Dragon Ball Z
 
"Oh,oh, I see! Runnin' away, are you!? You yellow bastards, come back here and get what's comin' to ya! I'll bite yer legs off!"

-Black Knight, Moty Python and the Holy Grail.
 
"Alright, I'm back in the saddle. What luck! This three-eyed cowboy is going for one...last...RIDE!"

~Tien Shinhan, in the Ocean dub of Dragon Ball Z
 
"Ew, ew, ew, ew ew ew ew ew. Ugly Naked Guy got a Thighmaster."

-- Chandler, Friends
 
"...You know, ugly people shouldn't be allowed to smile so much."

~Yusuke, Yu Yu Hakusho
 
Peter:"You're right, Lois. I'm always screwing up. Like that time with Jason Mraz."

Peter: "Oh my god, you're Jason Mraz!"

Guy: "No I'm not. I'm just some guy with a hat."

Peter: "Yeah, that's why Jason Mraz is!"
 
"Darkness... The void... THAT'S what the Doom Phantom thrives on. HE is the ultimate arbiter of life and death in the universe! HE...is to whom I pledge my wholehearted allegience. Not that pathetic Prince Diamond! All his allusions of power and conquest... What a RIDICULOUS fellow! Bring on the silence, the darkness...the chaos my master has commanded! No more petty human squabblings... ALL WILL BE SILENCED IN THE NAME OF THE DOOM PHANTOM!"

~Wiseman, in Sailor Moon, acting as if he and the Doom Phantom are two different people.
 
"Oh, Quagmire, you're more of a letdown than Fruit Stripe Gum! Mmm! Awe!"

-Peter Griffin
 
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