- Pronouns
- He/Him/His
You KNOW I had to... huh? I'm 10 years too late?? I don't know about any of that. I'm just an old squid with some new tricks!
So, another young flipperflapper kicked the chum bucket, but I'm feeling more alive than ever! Rejuvenated, like I was given free refills for a Tacticooler! I could even... I could even...! No, that's still not working. Clod Clammit. You may be wondering how I got here, maybe even how I ended up healthier than that little ghostfish Mona over there! Well, I had a grand night out. One for the history museum. Here's how this old seadog remembers it, anyhow.
When I stirred awake, I saw some newfangled laser tech in the West Gallery. It burned hotter than a pan of haddock, I'll tell you now. Ol' reliable Lyra waded right over to me when I called her, and we discussed a certain affinity I have for this Sun Stone malarkeybox. We made a deal of sorts... well, I don't know much about this stuff. But I had a theory.
I swam my way on to the Library, where I relieved Luke Atmey of the last fuel canister and lighter. Age before beauty, sonny! Then I raided the Metal Lab for scrap, including two pairs of handcuffs. I also spotted Lee Chaolan in glowing armour, Atmey setting the Coatroom ablaze in the 1F Hallways before he gets chased by Lee into the Plant Nursery, where he and a mysterious black-clad fella then start digging through the soil. What a weirdo! I also saw that nice young man Chad dressed as a firefighter. That's good of him. Service workers don't get enough respect these days!
And just before I get to the Train Exhibit, I see the darndest thing. Portricia Knightley, may the Salmonarch rest her soul, is leaving her bedroom and heading east. Right after, I hear some crazy cat noise coming from that direction. Huh?? I thought she was a... well, that's the last I saw of her anyway. May her gear have Quick Respawn nuggets equipped, and may her start point remain uncamped.
At the Train Exhibit, ol' Ghouligrab was poking around dearly departed Winter's body, before leaving with his precious goods. What a vulturefish. If you ever find my carcass, don't you dare make off with my bits and bobs - I'm saving them all for my grandsquids! After a while, I look out of the window and see Albina fighting a big chunk of slime and fish with a flail, before she hightails it down to the slide to avoid getting splatted. I would have helped, but I'm just an old squid. I don't know anything about that...
Little Mona shows up and warned me not to touch the train. I promised I wouldn't. And I meant every word! Well… every word except the train-related ones. I had a theory, y'see. A grand theory of stars and comets. I hear some rumbling, crashes and cannon fire, then some more rambsambling noise upstairs. Finally, that blasted Lee bumbles in and starts making a mess of the exhibit. Fortunately for me, Lyra finally decides to show up and splats the insolent little bugger with a sledgehammer. Kids these days. So violent!
Well, I needn't go over every little detail of my demonstration. It was quite shrimple. I tied us together, cuffed her to the train, set it all off, then set myshellf on fire. Y'see, my little theory was that this Sun Stone required a comet and a new star. And in my dream, I am the star. Fish. It's me. So when I started burning alive like a fried crab, I was sort of like the sun that they made this silly stone for. Well, that's when it all started to go wrong. I found a lovely purple gem in Lyra's pockets, which I thought I should hold on to in case I need to pay for the damages. Fortunately, it seemed to bring me back to life instead! Take that, suckerfish! They tried to krill me before, but I grilled myself back to life!
Anyway after that I burned the Aviation Exhibit plane down with myself in it. I was feeling a little overhydrated. What the shell, I still don't feel tip-top if I'm being honest. Alive, definitely alive, but...
I don't feel so good. Must be my knees...