Good wishes aren't always good wishes

Granted, but the spider gets revenge on you

I wish advertisements didn't conceal the truth
 
Granted, but you still fall for the advertisements regardless.

I wish that I had bug spray to eliminate the revenge seeking spider.
 
Granted but spiders aren't bugs

I wish i could rule the world for all eternity
 
Granted, but there's nothing in the world you can rule over, thus making your rule pointless

I wish spiders were less creepy looking
 
Granted but Dogs are now 1000000% more creepy
I wish i could rule the people of planet Earth for all eternity
 
Granted, but they become extint the moment you begin your rule.

I wish that my headphones would stop breaking.
 
Granted but any machine you could ever use to play music with breaks
I wish i could get an A on my homework assignment
 
Granted, but you still fail the class

I wish I took all AP classes and got A's in all of them, thus making my GPA 8.00 or higher
 
Granted, but the computer incorrectly swaps your marks with another's and messes up your GPA at the last minute.

I wish that I get an interesting and helpful teaching assistant for next week's lab.
 
Granted, but that teaching assistant is a fancy calculator.

I wish I can calculate stuff without resorting to a calculator
 
Granted, but your brain uses up all of your energy in the process of solving the questions.

I wish that my teaching assistant was not a fancy calculator.
 
Granted, it becomes a plain calculator

I wish technology would advance quicker
 
Granted, it's an absurd amount of money that crushes you alive

I wish I had ammonia D in my hands in a container
 
Granted, but the container breaks when you set it down.

I wish that the polar ice caps were not melting.
 
Granted, the entire world freezes instead

I wish the distance between the Sun and Alpha Centurai is not great
 
Granted, but the heat produced by the two of them together causes the Earth to go dry.

I wish that we could find information about whether Mars can truly support life.
 
Granted, but you remain permanently frozen as one in the arctic and are unable to move.

I wish that I had a freezie.
 
Granted, but I eat you

I wish you weren't who you are
 
Granted, it's a terrible one

I wish my stomach didn't hurt
 
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