MSTing:Horrible Smash Bros Crossover.

Glowsquid

Shine Sprite
Forum Moderator
Wiki Bureaucrat
Core 'Shroom Staff
Here.

This is an unbelievingly horrible piece of wiki fiction (And this is saying something). This page doesn't tell what the name of the fanfic is , and the Userpage of the guy got deleted. So yeah, no name recognition. Yet, it's almost amusing in it's ineptitude so here's a crappy mocking of it by me:

One day, Super paper luigi picked up the newspaper. He noticed that on the cover it said "MORE INFO, USERS, AND ARTICLES DISSAPPEARED. The only ones not yet struck are Wikia, Wikipedia, and Super Mario Wiki. Tomorrow we will have an interview with Super Mario Wiki user Super paper luigi."
"Hey. Nobody told me about that!"said SPL. "Oh well, I'd better get ready."
That's one professional newspaper right there.

(Big explosion sound)
(Written sound effect)

"What was that?"SPL said.
A Big explosion sound.

e and two of his bros (Great Gonzo and Super Mario97) went out to find a huge island flying through the sky.
That's some good pick-nicking plan.

"What is that?"asked Great Gonzo. "It's Wikia."said Toa Waluigi.
WHO THE HELL IS THIs GUY

"Without it, no new wikis can be made
Which is why us, Wikiepedia and TfWiki don't exist. Wait.

It landed near Voya Nui.
That place sucks.

How you ask.
I'm curious.

When BS01
Which is.

was breached some articles fell into the sea which, as you know, causes articles to become what they're based on."said Toa Waluigi.
Water is a strong mutagen.

"Well why don't we turn it into its main page and put it back?"Plumber asked coming to see SPL and Great Gonzo. "Energized Protodermis,"Toa Waluigi said,"
Toa Waluigi said,"tainted the sea it's what made me biomechanical and will most likely destroy you. I will survive
♪First I was afraid/I was petrified/ Kept thinking I could never live♪

because I found A Mask Of Flight.
Whcih you found in a Captain Crunch Box

And so Toa Waluigi flew of to Wikia to save anyone on Wikia.

He's so great!

"We can still get there if we go there through portals to Biosector, get some Masks of Flight, and fly to Wikia."said Plumber
Fly, for everlasting justice.

MESSAGE TO EVERYONE FROM WAYOSHI
And then out of nowhere message happened.

"Attention. The Power Star article has been stolen. As a result all power has been lost." he said.
Good think they never thought of back-up power sources, eh?

Which means we'll have to retrieve the article. But the only ones who can touch it are ones that have collected them all before." Which means we're going to need to free some friends."finished SPL.
"free some friends"? He didn't talk about any of them being captured...

First, went to the Mario article, but when they tried to pour water
A bunch of guys called First went on the Mario article

Then the Luigi, Wario, and Waluigi articles came their
The three articles they didn't pour water on become alive. How convenient.

Then a person in a shadowy flame appeared. The flame was to dark to make out any features.
And most importantly, it was too dark for the writer to makes any effort into describing it.

Then, using telepathy, he spoke to SPL in a twisted, barely distinguishable voice.
Villains have throath problems

You will defeat us
Don't be so defeatist!

so you must die."
Well that's a good plan.

Then, he shot a blast of shadow at SPL. He dodged it but it hit Waluigi
Good, I hate that guy.

exploding and destroying him and almost deleting his article!
GOOD RIDDANCE.

Take the article, I don't need it anymore. I have the key of the Super Mario Wiki."
Oh no you don't.

Then, he was gone.
Well, that was quick.

. "Wait," said Mario and Luigi "We're going, too."
Didn't the water failed to transform the Mario article.

"Hey,"3D said "You're not going without me."
Someone who never appeared before joins for no reason. How convenient.

The guy somehow managed to write 11 other chapters of this abomination, I'm scarred.
 

Stooben Rooben

Star Spirit
Chat Administrator
Retired Wiki Staff
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

I just died from laughter.
 

Weasel

Donkey Kong
Retired Forum Mod
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

It's a fan fic..... about the Wiki and its members? wut?

Good riffing. :lol:
 

Glowsquid

Shine Sprite
Forum Moderator
Wiki Bureaucrat
Core 'Shroom Staff
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

While at it, I'm going to post a similar riff I did on the Userpedia forum. I couldn't find a lot of good lines for Chapter 2 so I left it at that, but hey, maybe the inspiration will come back.
--------

Legend of the Infinite Empire was an ultra-popular Mariowiki fanfiction written by Xzelion back when he was still called "Great Gonzo".

I remember loving it to death back when I was that grammatically-impaired guy who couldn't speaks one sentence without mentioning Gradius. For some reasons, I decided to read it again and well...

It's bad.

Really bad.

Painfully bad.

So bad that I feel the need to subject it to the same treatment than Jaller's 2 awful fanfiction. Wish me good luck.


The first few chapters are pretty inane, but not especially outlandish. It's from Chapter 4 and onward that the insanity start. They have all one thing in comon, though, and it's that they're pretty tl:dr.

Chapter One

Legend of the Infinite Empire
The first chapter has the same name as the story... very creative.

One day Plumber was drinking a tasty cup of Hoo Hoo blend at the star bean café after his long and hard day of work.
Little do he know he's soon going to be stuck in a mess of bad grammar and incoherent plotting.

[...] Suddenly there was bright flash of light and [a] roar of thunder. Plumber looked to see a glorious figure gleaming with light.

The gleaming figure replied, “My name is Gonzales I am the Herald of Light,
Guess who wrote this story.


The figure was wearing white robes, and held tightly on his glowing blade.
So he's wearing more than one robe? ... Well, I guess I can't criticism one fashion sense.

Plumber smiled and took a sip of the Hoo Hoo Blend
"Ehehehe, I bet I can totally refill him that out-of-date shipment"

“My name is Gonzales I am the Herald of Light, and I have come from the world of light, to save yours from darkness.”
Herald of Light? Darkness? Wow man, that's starting to sound like a bad fanfiction!

... oh wait.

“What do you mean?”
“A story can’t be so cliché in it’s first few lines!”


Gonzales replied, “Years ago the Sysops who had special powers did war the Lord of Darkness.
Sysops have special powers that are uh, special. Special is a special word since it allow the writer to get away without describing anything.


The Sysops split up vowing never to use there sacred powers for as much destruction as they once had. So they left each of them in hiding this moment.
So they left they're power in hiding instead, of well, hiding themselves. Won't be very convenient when the Prince of Darkness attack, uh?

Plumber chuckled, “Me? Unite the sysops? You’re joking right?”
Yeah, why send some random café manager on the menial task of saving the world instead of you know, alerting more than one person.

Gonzales face became emotionless
"Oh god, this story is tricking on longer than I thought"

Gonzales’ face came to life
"Yeeeeaahhhhh! I'm soon going to leave this story!"

“First Heroic Plumber take your employees, Super Mario97 and Super Paper Luigi, then seek out Maxlover2, much knowledge does that one have.
"I could tell you everything you need to know, but my coffee break is in two minutes."

Plumber bring the Sysops to the ancient grove, there shall Darkness be defeated and fall forever!
♪And ever and ever and ever.♪

Plumber every last word that had to be said from Gonzales, his top two employees,
Writer words in the sentence, making nonsensical.

SPL and Mario97 were brothers in fact they were hard working never taking sick days
How does being brothers has anything to do with them never taking sick days?

they unclogged seemingly thousands of clogged tubes/pipes
Tubes/Pipes means the same/identical thing.

Plumber smiled and shouted “SPL, Mario97 my office NOW!”
"WHO PUT THAT FIRECRACKER ON MY CHAIR!?"

SPL headed towards Plumbers office, Mario97 followed Suit.
... Suit?

Plumber sitting in his nice reclining chair with a can of Mountain Dew he took a long sip of the Greenish Soda and smiled, “Guys. We’re going somewhere.”

Mario97 spoke up, “Were boss?”
He didn't say anything about you two being boss, dumbass.

per Luigi chimed in, “Yeah, Boss were?”
Youre?

Plumber turned toward SPL, “Many though that but if Gonzo is right, The Fate of Mariowiki rest in our hands”. Super Mario turned toward Plumber,
He didn't call himself Gonzo...

“How are we suppose to do that?
Yeah, especially when one of the heroes can't even be bothered to conjugate "suppose" correctly...

Gonzo is being of light
... And when the main hero himself can't speaks correctly, either.

Plumber and Duo of his best employees began a long trip to see Max2,
Wait, where's SPL and SM67? And who's this "Duo of his best employees" guy you speaks off?

Max2 was the same race as Tumble, and some claimed he was.
Some claims Max2 is the same race as Tumble because he is the same race as Tumble... Seems pretty logical.

Plumber and the Bros. were standing face-to-face with a ferocious Chain Chomp. Plumber leaped high above the Chain Chomp to were he was behind it,
Plumber h4x jumping skills allow him to exist in two places at the same time.

Maxlover2 was watching the sunset, while eating a large bowl of vanilla Ice Cream.
he was too cheap to buy a fireplace, see.

When suddenly the door was kicked in, a plumber dressed in Purple and Black, followed by another plumber dressed in White and Green clothing, White and Blue.
White and Green or White and Blue?

Plumber smiled, “My name is Plumber…And please don’t throw Whiskered Eggplants at me.”
..?

Plumber replied, “I need to know where the Sysops are.” Max turned his cubed head, “I’m sorry, I cannot give you the location of HK-47, I swore a vow not to do so.”
He didn't mention HK 47, dumbass.

Plumber, SPL and Mario97 awoke in a prison cell, each of them
Imprisoned because of crimes against basic grammar.

“Plumber…why have you come here?” Plumber chuckled, “The Prince of Darkness is ready to appear he will wreak havoc upon our world, unless the Sysops defeat him as once did to the King of Evil.”
... King of Evil? I thought he was called Lord of Darkness.

HK’s face was socked


Like that?

“Give me all your coins” replied HK. Mario97 without a doubt pulled out his wallet which was full of 999 coins and handed it to HK, SPL followed suit. Plumber took a moment, then pulled out his huge sack of 999,999,999,999
Either Plumber is the richest guy on the planet, or the economy of the wiki is in really, really, really bad shape.

“Alright let’s do this, but first,” HK handed them their wallets back, “The test was how modest you were.”
So modesty is apparently now the act of giving all of your money to a complete stranger based on his whims. Um... okay?

While Max2 joined the Trio of Plumbers on their quest to reunited the Sysops.
Reunited? That means it's already over, YES! YES!

They’re Drybones everywhere,
Yeah, too bad they can't change their species depending on the place :(.

each throw large pieces of bone or rocks.
... And that's the only thing they can do for the rest of their life. Sad.

I am Drybones leader of my fellow kind. Surrender now and you will not be harmed.”
Ok, Drybones leader of my fellow kind!

Plumber stood ready to block the attack, but he realized he was no longer in the heat of battle. He realized he was standing face-to-face the Sysop, Salty. “Hello” the Sysop spoke, a great tone of power in his voice. Plumber turned to see his allies eating potato chips.
... Erm, so while they were attacked, everyone except Plumber was eating Potato Chips? waaaaaaa

Plumber ran his finger threw his stache,
That must have been painful.

he turned and Drybones stood there dwarfing the Plumber in size, his mouth opened, and fire exploded in the Plumber’s face, “ARGH” Plumber screamed.
ARGH

The rest of the chapter is a really inane battle between Dry Bones and TEH PRINCE OF DARKNESS that is too boring to mock.

What will become of Plumber?

What will Drybones do now that the Prince of Darkness has betrayed him?

And did you notice Drybones only defeated 11 hammer Bros.?
1: Saved by some contrived plot device, most certainly.

2: He will buy himself a cozy beach resort and never be involved in this mess of a story again!... Well, that's what should happen.

3: Hm-hm Too bad that that Hammer Bros will never appear again.
 

Stooben Rooben

Star Spirit
Chat Administrator
Retired Wiki Staff
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

My ribs are actually hurting, Blitz. XD
 
N

Nerdy Guy

Guest
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

I almost fell out of my chair at the "sock face" part.
Great job finding this crappy story, Blitz.
 

Lario

Seems so long ago.
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

I laughed even more at this new yet old fan fiction...

My favorite guy so far is Duo of his best employees!
 

SmartGuy

A complete wanker.
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

I've read Blitz' mockery of Legend of the Infinite Empire numerous times and it's still hilarious, especially the jumping hax part.
 

Lario

Seems so long ago.
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Lumberjack said:
I've read Blitz' mockery of Legend of the Ultimate Empire numerous times and it's still hilarious, especially the jumping hax part.
Me too...

I love the parts with the Dry Bones, Suit, the part where Plumber throws his 'stache, and the part with them being imprisoned for bad grammer.
 

SmartGuy

A complete wanker.
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Lario said:
Lumberjack said:
I've read Blitz' mockery of Legend of the Ultimate Empire numerous times and it's still hilarious, especially the jumping hax part.
Me too...

I love the parts with the Dry Bones, Suit, the part where Plumber throws his 'stache, and the part with them being imprisoned for bad grammer.
Looks like you'll be joining them soon. :)
 

Stooben Rooben

Star Spirit
Chat Administrator
Retired Wiki Staff
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Lumberjack said:
Lario said:
Lumberjack said:
I've read Blitz' mockery of Legend of the Ultimate Empire numerous times and it's still hilarious, especially the jumping hax part.
Me too...

I love the parts with the Dry Bones, Suit, the part where Plumber throws his 'stache, and the part with them being imprisoned for bad grammer.
Looks like you'll be joining them soon. :)
lol
 

Lario

Seems so long ago.
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Lumberjack said:
Lario said:
Lumberjack said:
I've read Blitz' mockery of Legend of the Ultimate Empire numerous times and it's still hilarious, especially the jumping hax part.
Me too...

I love the parts with the Dry Bones, Suit, the part where Plumber throws his 'stache, and the part with them imprisoned for bad grammer.
Looks like you'll be joining them soon. :)
Never?
 

ChaosNinji

Shine Sprite
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

MST3K said:
It's a fan fic..... about the Wiki and its members? wut?

Good riffing. :lol:
Never go to Userpedia.

Seriously. Nobody should ever go to Userpedia.
 

Stooben Rooben

Star Spirit
Chat Administrator
Retired Wiki Staff
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Ninji said:
MST3K said:
It's a fan fic..... about the Wiki and its members? wut?

Good riffing. :lol:
Never go to Userpedia.

Seriously. Nobody should ever go to Userpedia.
As long as you stay away from the really cheesy crap (*cough*BladeBro*cough*Yoshario*cough*) it's not too bad.

But, the bad-to-good comic ratio is overwhelming, yeah. There's only, like, 5 good comics on Userpedia.
 

Lario

Seems so long ago.
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

I'd have to agree with the above person...

I don't go there much anyway as I go to many other sites...
 

ChaosNinji

Shine Sprite
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Is it even worth having a Userpedia by now? The forums also seem to be a bit... well, you know.

@Lario: Do you ever post something that isnt "QFT", "Per ___", or "I agree with the person above" anymore? Seriously, it's getting a bit annoying.
 

Stooben Rooben

Star Spirit
Chat Administrator
Retired Wiki Staff
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Ninji said:
Is it even worth having a Userpedia by now? The forums also seem to be a bit... well, you know.
It's getting better, albeit slowly. The FA process just got set up today; we're getting a regular flow of comics; there's actually more regular contributors there than on the MarioWiki. >.> And yeah, the forums there are completely dead.
ChaosNinji said:
@Lario: Do you ever post something that isnt "QFT", "Per ___", or "I agree with the person above" anymore? Seriously, it's getting a bit annoying.
I'm not trying to be a smartass when I say this, but I agree. It seems like 90% of his posts are nothing but that.
 

ChaosNinji

Shine Sprite
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Stooben Rooben said:
Ninji said:
Is it even worth having a Userpedia by now? The forums also seem to be a bit... well, you know.
It's getting better, albeit slowly. The FA process just got set up today; we're getting a regular flow of comics; there's actually more regular contributors there than on the MarioWiki. >.> And yeah, the forums there are completely dead.
Alright. Just wondering.
 

Lario

Seems so long ago.
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

I don't have enough I can relate to...

Unless I can make it Mindless Junk, as this is the...

NEVERMIND.
 

Glowsquid

Shine Sprite
Forum Moderator
Wiki Bureaucrat
Core 'Shroom Staff
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Here's Chapter 2 of Legend of the Infinite Empire! Unfortunately, it's slightly less aggressively stupid than the last:

In the shadows,
Which are dark, and scary.

when the screen flickered to life, the black screen and molten yellow eyes glared seemingly straight at Isyou
I love when a comma, doesn't actually connect two sentences.

but nothing frightened Isyou
He's one radical rat!

He was also known as the “Grim Death Burglar the 2nd”
Aka Adjective World Salad Random Numbernd.

Some knew him as the “Shadow in the corner, The Whisper in your ear”
The terror that flaps in the night, The batteries that are not included..!

The screen finally broke the silence,
It has Stereo Sound!

Mario97 still carried Plumber through the Dark Forest. Legend stated a large band of ghosts were exiled into the Dark Forest never to return to there home
Legend is a nice and helpful person. Too bad he'll never appear again.

SPL was shivering. Mario97 knew it was not because it was cold
What a genius.

SPL had a certain…dislike for ghosts. SPL turned every step he had to stop and scan for ghosts, which were not there. Mario97 never really knew why SPL was afraid, he turned, “Hey SPL…Bro, Why are you so afraid of ghosts?” Hesitantly, SPL took a deep breath, “I don’t know they’re just so…so scary.”
That's a really good reason!

“You know in order to find this Ghost Jam,
Now they're releasing those in Ghost flavors.

and you must conqueror this fear.
I think that would be too epic of a task.

Max2 laughed, “I’m not afraid of a ghost!”
Well, now you know who ya gonna call!

Drybones trekked through the marsh, his feet wet, and his stomach crying for food.
Undead piles of bone need foods you know.

. The Dry Bowser could either hide for the rest of his life, or seek out help, which would only come from the Trio of Plumbers and the dice head.
The entire world population has been reduced to three grammatically-impaired idiots and a dick head... I mean dice.

But then, out of the shadows and trees Boos appeared;
Those ghosts perfected the art of hiding behind trees.

Max2 hid behind Mario97’s buff body.
That's not being a coward! It's being tactically aware!

Mario97 stared back at the ghost’s eyes. The ghost backed down, the entire army of ghosts disappeared
Aesop of this story: Ghost are wusses.

SPL was running, running like never before. He stopped and turned, but no one was behind him. Max2, Super M97, and Plumber had probably been eaten by the ghosts.
The Narrator doesn't remember what happened one paragraph ago.

He turned around, and saw a purple furry creature standing there smiling. SPL freaked out was beginning to run
SPL freaked out was beginning to run forgot his dentist apointement started a rock band was kill by demons


Aipom shook his head in disbelief, “SPL there’s time, Let me help you conquer your fears.” SPL laughed, “That’s not possibly.”
That's not possibly possible!

“No SPL it’s not put other first, they could be dying this moment.
It's good to be selfish.

Aipom grinned
"I'm such in a mess of bad grammar and incoherent plotting now..."

“Put your brother first and put your fear behind you.”
Feng Shui as told by a Pokemon.

SPL’s eyes were shut so tight, just then he had a vision. Ghosts everywhere his allies defeated. Him alone A fear of being alone SPL could barely hear Aipom’s soft voice.
This terrific vision turned the wimpy SPL into the infinitely more badass form "A fear of being alone SPL".

Aipom’s voice was crisp, clean, “and at last awaken…Super Paper Luigi.”
It's so crisp and clear, it doesn't need to bother with grammar.

“Chicken!” Max2’s voice echoed down the hallway.
I guess the question was "Who are you?"

Ghost Jam, was white a white flying Shy Guy,
He's whiter than thou.

The entire room lit up, Max2 make note of the thousands of thousands of ghosts.
A junior Sherlock Holmes.

Plumber drank some it was disgusting it wasn’t hot, it was cold, and tasted too sweet. Plumber drank it all, “Ugh what was that?” Plumber asked. Ghost Jan smiled, “Jelly Soup.”
Disgusting.

Isyou watched through the lens of the binoculars, Ghost Manor was large, perhaps thousand of Ghosts. He had assembled the Battalion that the Prince of Darkness gave him control of.
In several, easy to assemble pieces.

Ghost Jams’ personal body guards, Yoshi626 and theGreatBolckBoo
I leave dirty puns to the audience.

Unlike most ghosts these ghosts were tough.B. Unlike most ghosts these ghosts were tough.
As long as they're not defeated by starring at them, yeah.

Isyou stepped forward, “Surrender Sysop I have you surrounded.”
Isyou love alliterations.

SPL and Aipom reached it, a large citadel, known as the Forgotten Resting Place. SPL shouted,”Boos show yourself to me!” A million boos appeared, a Big Boo in the front, SPL presumed him to be leader. The Big Boo replied, “Why have you disturbed our resting place?” SPL chuckled, “Because your Boo friends need your help.”
Well now they're all dead.

SPL nodded, “Then is shall be done,
its a good day to do what has to be done by me and help my brother to defeat the enemys

The battle was well over with, Isyou was missing, and the entire invasion force was routed. Big Tom, SPL and Ghost Jam stood in a circle. “You promised him what?!?” screamed Ghost Jam, “you promised him forgiveness?!”
Ghost Jam... don't be such a scrooge! A grammar-impaired scrooge.

Drybones woke up, a large blankets was settled upon him,
Those blankets are invading privacy.

; there was a Toad, his hair golden and spiked up.
Fashion victim.

Plumber stopped, SPL looked and saw Isyou standing there. Plumber pulled out his baseball bat, SPL followed suit.
So there he is!

Will Drybones find our heroes?

What secrets await Plumber and his friends?

Will They Accept Isyous help?
1: Now, he'll buy his coozy beach resort damnit.

2: Wacky sci-fi injinks.

3: Now there's more of him?
 

Lario

Seems so long ago.
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

I wondered what happened to Duo of his best employees, Legend, and Suit...
 

SmartGuy

A complete wanker.
Re: MSTing:Toa Waluigi's Fanfiction

Sorry, but that wasn't nearly as funny as the first one, Blitz.
 
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