The Baby Fan
My friend wants Call of Duty, but he is only 13 years old.
Ned Kelly said:saying a Mario shooter would be dumbed down
>>>gives Call of Duty as an example of a shooter that's not dumbed down
Yes, this will seem like Complaining About Games I Don't Play, dismissed as trolling, and promptly deleted, but I just want to vent. Okay, first up: Mario.
* First point: The Mushroom Kingdom is a Sugar Bowl compared to anything resembling the real world. I know, games shouldn't try to look real, right? Wrong. I want to be able to feel like this place might just exist, and in making the Mushroom Kingdom such a Sickeningly Sweet place, Nintendo has alienated me from the series.
* Second, the characters. There's barely any characterization at all. Bowser's the villain, Peach is the princess that needs rescued, and the Mario brothers are the dudes who do the rescuing. Beyond that, there's nothing at all to tell you why you should do anything.
So what do I propose? Replace the Mario brothers. The next time Bowser kidnaps Peach, the brothers will gladly go in to rescue her, but this time King Koopa ain't messin' around. He kills the two guys when they enter his throne room. However, needing heroes, a new portal to the kingdom opens. This time, two mafia hitmen emerge, Mario and Luigi Corleone(yeah, I know, I just pulled that name straight from The Godfather, but it's all I could think of for American-Italians mafiosi. Sorry.). Their cover is that their family business is plumbing, but these two guys are here to kill people. They've got Tommy guns, Browning Automatic Rifles and Colt M1911s. They hear of the kidnapped princess and decide to take on the job just for the cash. They kill their way through the Koopa hordes. Bowser is killed when a .30-06 round goes through his left eye. Peach is rescued, but neither of them get any romantic vibe. For these two, it's "Strictly business."
I did not give Call of Duty as an example of a shooter that's not dumbed down, although I suppose it was implied. But that wasn't what I meant; Baby Time just mentioned Call of Duty, so I ran with it.Glowsquid said: