Good wishes aren't always good wishes

Granted, but they can't grant wishes.

I wish that people will stop repeating wishes. Like this.

[quote author=Baby Hater]I wish that I had a Wii.[/quote]
[quote author=Baby Peach]Granted, but it breaks.[/quote]
[quote author=Baby Hater]I wish that I had a Wii, and it would not break.[/quote]
[quote author=Baby Luigi]Granted, but somebody steals it.[/quote]
[quote author=Baby Hater]I wish that I had a Wii, it would not break and it would not be stolen.[/quote]
[quote author=Baby Mario]Granted, but it is pink, a color you don't like.[/quote]
And so on.
 
Granted, but Mario Super Sluggers ceases to exist.

I wish for bacon. I don't lose anything as a result of eating the bacon. No one else gets bacon. I don't gain or lose weight before, during, or after the bacon-eating. There is no shortage of any food of quality before, during, or after the bacon. It is NOT turkey bacon. There is nothing other than a small amount of salt on the bacon. The bacon is cooked properly. I don't have to risk my life to get the bacon. The bacon was cooked properly five minutes ago, and I don't have to wait to eat the bacon.
 
Lord Ghirahim said:
Granted, but Mario Super Sluggers ceases to exist.

I wish for bacon. I don't lose anything as a result of eating the bacon. No one else gets bacon. I don't gain or lose weight before, during, or after the bacon-eating. There is no shortage of any food of quality before, during, or after the bacon. It is NOT turkey bacon. There is nothing other than a small amount of salt on the bacon. The bacon is cooked properly. I don't have to risk my life to get the bacon. The bacon was cooked properly five minutes ago, and I don't have to wait to eat the bacon.
Click to expand...

What did Mario Super Sluggers have to do with my wish? I could just choose another username.

Granted, but it tastes awful.

I wish that people will stop repeating wishes, like the way I am doing. It ruins the fun out of the game.
 
Granted, but your Wii explodes.

I wish for bacon. I don't lose anything as a result of eating the bacon. No one else gets bacon. I don't gain or lose weight before, during, or after the bacon-eating. There is no shortage of any food of quality before, during, or after the bacon. It is NOT turkey bacon. There is nothing other than a small amount of salt on the bacon. The bacon is cooked properly. I don't have to risk my life to get the bacon. The bacon was cooked properly five minutes ago, and I don't have to wait to eat the bacon. It tastes perfectly delicious.
 
Granted. You die immediately afterwards.

I wish for death.
 
Granted, but you are reincarnated as a janitor.

I wish for bacon. I don't lose anything as a result of eating the bacon. No one else gets bacon. I don't gain or lose weight before, during, or after the bacon-eating. There is no shortage of any food of quality before, during, or after the bacon. It is NOT turkey bacon. There is nothing other than a small amount of salt on the bacon. The bacon is cooked properly. I don't have to risk my life to get the bacon. The bacon was cooked properly five minutes ago, and I don't have to wait to eat the bacon. It tastes perfectly delicious. I don't die any earlier or later than the average life expectancy of a human male in the USA circa 2011 would imply I would.
 
Granted, I give up.

I wish for this topic to change this game.
 
Granted, but now I just make wishes that plan for every eventuality possible without a build-up, so it's even more boring for you.

I wish for bacon. I don't lose anything as a result of eating the bacon. No one else gets bacon. I don't gain or lose weight before, during, or after the bacon-eating. There is no shortage of any food of quality before, during, or after the bacon. It is NOT turkey bacon. There is nothing other than a small amount of salt on the bacon. The bacon is cooked properly. I don't have to risk my life to get the bacon. The bacon was cooked properly five minutes ago, and I don't have to wait to eat the bacon. It tastes perfectly delicious. I don't die any earlier or later than the average life expectancy of a human male in the USA circa 2011 would imply I would. No one gives up on this game after this wish.
 
Granted, but the bacon is burned and destroyed by accident.

I wish that bacon is banned.
 
Granted, but are all your friends.

I wish for bacon. I don't lose anything as a result of eating the bacon. No one else gets bacon. I don't gain or lose weight before, during, or after the bacon-eating. There is no shortage of any food of quality before, during, or after the bacon. It is NOT turkey bacon. There is nothing other than a small amount of salt on the bacon. The bacon is cooked properly. I don't have to risk my life to get the bacon. The bacon was cooked properly five minutes ago, and I don't have to wait to eat the bacon. It tastes perfectly delicious. I don't die any earlier or later than the average life expectancy of a human male in the USA circa 2011 would imply I would. No one gives up on this game after this wish. It does not get destroyed in any way, shape, form, or fashion before I eat it.
 
tl;dr

I wish for a shorter wish.