Hello there, readers of unknown fate. Our paths have aligned. In this moment, for however long you may have left before we diverge once again, allow me to tell you a tale to pass the time.
---Ah, I see you're eager to hear my story. Very well. I shall try to keep it brief, so listen carefully.
A long time ago, at the edge of one universe, a curious oracle performed a forbidden ritual, spawning the Red Comet. This comet is known by many names, as it carried an entity capable of travelling between universes and timelines. It carried arcane knowledge from a universe fraught with despair, delivering power beyond control to any world it arrived in. It carried change, whether desired or not.
...aha. So, you might be familiar with it, too. Very good.
Of the many worlds touched by the comet since its creation, there is one in which it always terminates. A world forgone by the stars itself. One that, until the comet's arrival, was not meant to exist.
The many watchers of fate know this particular event is immutable, but the lead-up to its occurance is radically different, depending on observation. The comet messes with such chronicles, you see, as change is the natural rival of fate. In spite of this, one timeline was ultimately documented, and our observations have ceased for the time being. The world of its terminus currently knows peace.
However, whilst picking through the tapestry of timelines of this world which appeared before us, an impossibility appeared. Such things are amusements to a humble stargazer.
So, dear listener, in the moments before our departure, I shall speak now of a version of this world's timeline that radically divulges from any rationality. The stage was set from the actions of that curious oracle at the far end of space and time, but this would be as if the actors burned the script and danced on its ashes, causing the show to take a dramatic turn towards the absurd and improbable.
This tale is about the most unthinkable timeline I've observed in my many eons as a watcher of the stars.
Unfortunately, I've named it. Not like an artist christening their work with an abstract on its existence, but like a curator putting a relic on display in a museum, for all to marvel at its curiosity...
This tale is about...
The Dr. Acraman Succeeds Timeline
(...Hm. It seems we've arrived quite late. Maseonhunters will have to enter an even longer hiatus; the networks won't appreciate that...)
Ah yes, are you the organiser? Unfortunately, Sirius and I are very busy men, and you'll have to forgive me for our report being tardy. There are a lot of appraisals to undertake, artifacts to duplicate, and profit to be made. People-watching is... arduous. Regardless, our preparations may be much later than anticipated, but we shall not waste your time any further.
From 7 votes to 1:
1. The Ernest Fine Bros.
2. Scottish Mario
3. Cornelius
4. Punished Luigi
5. Prince Peach and Seam
6. El Presidente
7. Gangsta Mario
(How curious. I recognised a great deal of names on the full list we were told to assess. Some, I crossed weapons with on that island...)
And of course, the endorsement. I've appraised its legitimacy myself.
I, GBA, endorse Nobu Sirius and Acraman.
Signed, Sirius endorsement-giver GBA.
...
Alton, my fellow, they have hot dogs here! We can set up a rival business... Star Dogs! Ohohoho... yes!
If all is in order, you'll have to excuse me.
Dr. Alton Acraman / Sirius Shinkai
The most ideal versions of Dr. Acraman and Sirius Shinkai, two NPCs from AKGO who were denied any development due to their early Night 1 deaths. These versions hail from an impossible timeline in which they were the only survivors of the Starline Cruises killing games, otherwise known as The Dr. Acraman Succeeds Timeline.
General Description
Acraman as he appears in AKGO, but with a slightly more casual outfit, wielding a briefcase filled with arcane, Maseonic gadgets he can use at will. Sirius Shinkai, except as a paradoxical fusion of all three Siriuses in one body. He wears a hawaiian shirt, shorts, sandals, and has a star pendant. When he wants to call upon some of the powers of Sirius, he covers his mouth with one hand, and his eyes begin to glow.
Abilities/Strengths/Weaknesses
Both of these men are caniving con artists who employ deception, treachery and emotional manipulation to obtain priceless artifacts for reselling, so they lack empathy and can easily tag team someone to appraise them fiscally (as in, the value of the weapons and objects another combatant holds) and spiritually (their mental state, spirituality, etc.), and exploit their weaknesses in both. In any kind of pre battle monologue or discussion, they'd be liable to get the upper hand without the other party being aware. In the midst of a fight, such a trait is less useful.
Having bested the rest of the AKGO cast in an alternate timeline, they have witnessed versions of AKGO combatants fall before each other or themselves, and have watched their weaknesses exploited through first hand experience in order to be the sole survivors of the Starline Cruises killing games. This leaves them more observant and knowledgable of fellow AKGO attendees to an extent, but slightly less knowledgable of those from other worlds. Acraman can utilise his appraisal abilities to bolster their knowledge of other civilisations or worlds as best he can.
Having visited Maseon, Acraman has appraised which of the technological artifacts and weaponry on the island were most valuable to grab before his eventual escape with Sirius, which later resulted in his triumphant success in the historical sphere, elevating his career experience as a museum curator to new heights. He has exceptional taste in everything except condiments. Additionally, a near death experience with a chocolate cookie laced with hand sanitiser has made him dedicate a large portion of his time to being prepared to treat food poisoning at any time, just in case.
For combat, Acraman wields a stolen briefcase from the late (in his timeline) Cel. Acraman stores many such gadgets inside, including collapsable resonance poles, capable of EMPing due to Cel's modifications, magical objects synthesized from the lake observatory generator (in particular, Tomatoes), and a particularly hyper improvised mechanical Ketchup-based machine gun. He prefers to stand back and let Sirius take charge until absolutely necessary, acting as the appraiser of their situation. This results in him becoming slightly flustered when their gambits fail, and while he's aware of this, he still lacks the ability to properly improvise beyond the first iteration of a plan.
Sirius is the ever more relaxed of the two, yet the larger powerhouse. Containing vast knowledge of the three AKGO arcana and their associated magics, as well as a heightened sense of spirituality and understanding of Sterwegenic fate, the entity known as Sirius occupies a vessel known as Shinkai with spiritual knowledge and dirty tricks aplenty, and is called upon by Shinkai covering his mouth. Despite being the entity that created MB-K, the trappings of Shinkai's mortality prevent Sirius from accessing more higher level magical abilities or timeline manipulation, due to the length of time Shinkai's been alive for, but Sirius still wields the authority granted to him by his spirit. Since his tropical vacation of wanton death, Shinkai's become hedonistic, and brash. He might not go along with the most optimal plan in favour of one that just seems cooler.
he also just wants to grill, for god's sake
Summary/Traits
+ On tonight's episode of Maseonhunters...
+ General underhanded business acumen. Acraman appraises their opponents while Sirius manipulates, and the two devise schemes that require them to work in tandem with both magic and technology.
+ Particular insight to AKGO matchups, having seen the downfall of all of its participants in the Dr. Acraman Succeeds Timeline.
+ Swift and accurate appraisal of the technological and magical aspects of opponents' abilities. Handling them afterward is another question, but if the answer is simple, they'll latch onto it instantly. That's why Acraman has upgraded to having two pairs of glasses on his person at all times.
+ Acraman wields what he believes to be the apex of Maseonic technology, and a Ketchup-based machine gun which nailed him at least two kills.
+/- Sirius is filled with vast magical abilities but remains rooted by his hedonistic vessel, who would rather take the more fun and exciting route during a fight instead of the most optimal.
- General weakness to being overwhelmed if their schemes do not work, and resulting to desperate "random bullshit go"-ing after a point.
- Acraman may leave Sirius out to dry on occasion because he thinks he knows better, and Sirius may simply choose to do something else on his own whim.
+/- They survived their ordeal through sheer luck-turned-opportunity for growth, and as such, Acraman in particular is more aware of his weaknesses, meaning any likelihood for failure will not stem from overconfidence but rather inability to further improvise beyond a few plans or their nature to disagree on the best path forward.
- Acraman's mostly just a guy, and very reliant on his Maseonic technology and also cannot control Sirius' actions entirely.
- Sirius is a spiritual entity and vulnerable to spiritual interference or beings of similar power, moreso now that Shinkai's nature has tamed him further with more vessel occupance.
+ Sirius knows how to rig a grilling device at any time for grilling. Can also be explosive.
- The Dr. Acraman Succeeds Timeline refers strictly to how he fared in his home universe. We may soon see the Dr. Acraman Sucks Timeline in action in mbmb.
/j
