Attempt to Suicide

[Paper Yoshi]

I listen to "Revolution 9".

 

[LN1]

I go to outer space without a suit.

 

[UltraMario]

I swallow nitroglycerin and wait for UM to punch me in the stomach.

D'aw, I wanna throw a fiery baseball at your stomach instead. .

 

[Bop1996]

I swallow nitroglycerin and wait for UM to punch me in the stomach.

D'aw, I wanna throw a fiery baseball at your stomach instead. .

*huge image of our impending deaths*

Fine, but make it thrown fast pls.

 

[Mario4Ever]

I value my life too much to take it.

 

[Kong Rong]

I preform brain surgery on myself with a spoon, some staples, and a apple

 

[Smashley]

I jump off an airplane without a parachute.

 

[UltraMario]

I get locked in a room with a child molester, a rapist, and a prostitute.

 

[Pyro]

I get locked in a room with a child molester, a rapist, and a prostitute.

Aftershocks of the earlier earthquake rip through the room.

Pinkie's death count: 3

I jump off an airplane without a parachute.

But you land on a bouncy Shiny Vulpix and you win.

Smasher's Shiny Vulpix count: 1

I preform brain surgery on myself with a spoon, some staples, and a apple

A plastic spoon, a store, and a tomato, huh?
GS' death count: 1

I value my life too much to take it.

SO MUCH VALUING
NOT ENOUGH BODY PAIN
OLOOONHOGFRGB
M4Ever's death count: 1

I go to outer space without a suit.

However, you accidentaly bring a helmet.

Luigi Bandicoot's death count: 0

I listen to "Revolution 9".

NOOOOOOO
PY's death count: 1
Pyro's death count: 1

I engage in a heated debate with Dr. Javelin and SonicMario.

It's such a heated debate that the room burns up.
Toad's death count: 2
Javelin's death count: 1
SonicMario's death count: 1

I swallow nitroglycerin and wait for UM to punch me in the stomach.

But a fiery baseball flies out of nowhere. Poof

Bop's death count: 3

 

[Toad Eightyfive]

When I saw UM's death count, I thought it said ":3"

 

[Paper Yoshi]

I listen to "Revolution 9".

NOOOOOOO
PY's death count: 1
Pyro's death count: 1

I win.