Attempt to Suicide

[Paper Yoshi]

I listen to "Revolution 9".

 

[LN1]

I go to outer space without a suit.

 

[UltraMario]

I swallow nitroglycerin and wait for UM to punch me in the stomach.

D'aw, I wanna throw a fiery baseball at your stomach instead. .

 

[Bop1996]

I swallow nitroglycerin and wait for UM to punch me in the stomach.

D'aw, I wanna throw a fiery baseball at your stomach instead. .

*huge image of our impending deaths*

Fine, but make it thrown fast pls.

 

[Mario4Ever]

I value my life too much to take it.

 

[Daniel Dyce]

I preform brain surgery on myself with a spoon, some staples, and a apple

 

[Smashley]

I jump off an airplane without a parachute.

 

[UltraMario]

I get locked in a room with a child molester, a rapist, and a prostitute.

 

[Pyro]

I get locked in a room with a child molester, a rapist, and a prostitute.

Aftershocks of the earlier earthquake rip through the room.

Pinkie's death count: 3

I jump off an airplane without a parachute.

But you land on a bouncy Shiny Vulpix and you win.

Smasher's Shiny Vulpix count: 1

I preform brain surgery on myself with a spoon, some staples, and a apple

A plastic spoon, a store, and a tomato, huh?
GS' death count: 1

I value my life too much to take it.

SO MUCH VALUING
NOT ENOUGH BODY PAIN
OLOOONHOGFRGB
M4Ever's death count: 1

I go to outer space without a suit.

However, you accidentaly bring a helmet.

Luigi Bandicoot's death count: 0

I listen to "Revolution 9".

NOOOOOOO
PY's death count: 1
Pyro's death count: 1

I engage in a heated debate with Dr. Javelin and SonicMario.

It's such a heated debate that the room burns up.
Toad's death count: 2
Javelin's death count: 1
SonicMario's death count: 1

I swallow nitroglycerin and wait for UM to punch me in the stomach.

But a fiery baseball flies out of nowhere. Poof

Bop's death count: 3

 

[Toad Eightyfive]

When I saw UM's death count, I thought it said ":3"

 

[Paper Yoshi]

I listen to "Revolution 9".

NOOOOOOO
PY's death count: 1
Pyro's death count: 1

I win.

 

[New Super Mario]

I fall into lava

 

[Toad Eightyfive]

I sit in a bathtub for five hours.

 

[Pyro]

I fall into lava

NO, NOT INTO THE PIT! IT BURNS!

NSM's death count: 1

I sit in a bathtub for five hours.

Your skin is so dry you can't move. However, since you can't move, your skin eventually goes back to its moistened state.

Then a Shiny Vulpix runs past you.

Smasher's Shiny Vulpix count: 2
Toad's death count: 2

 

[Bop1996]

I stand next to UM.

 

[Pyro]

I stand next to UM.

UM is distracted by a running shiny Vulpix. The Vulpix runs to Texas and breaks into Smasher's house.

Bop's death count: 3
Pinkie's death count: 3
Smasher's shiny Vulpix Count: :3

 

[UltraMario]

OH BOY, A SHINY VULPIX! *chases*

 

[Bop1996]

I thought that would work...

I walk into the Shadow Temple without the Sun's Song.

 

[UltraMario]

I get a garbage man to perform plastic surgery on me.

 

[Pyro]

I walk into the Shadow Temple without the Sun's Song.

Shiny Vulpix won't let you in.

Bop's death count: 3

I get a garbage man to perform plastic surgery on me.

Pinkie's death count: 4?

 

[Bop1996]

I attempt to have a conversation with UM without hearing "No u" in the conversation somewhere.

 

[Pyro]

I attempt to have a conversation with UM without hearing "No u" in the conversation somewhere.

UM stabs himself due to the restriction.

Pinkie's death count: 5

 

[Daniel Dyce]

I wear a Top Hat made of fire and a Monocle made of acid and a tie that is made of dragon food also i'm on dragon island

 

[Smashley]

I listen to a Justin Bieber album.

Do i win yet

 

[yoshidude99]

I stand under a Thwomp