Control the Throne

I give your polite doge a chocolate beam. I sit on the throne having tea with pandapowah
 
Thanks for giving that dog a chocolate beam, now he can transform stuff into chocolate at will. By the way, don't attempt to make me chocolate, as you'll fail, since I'm already slightly chococolate, just enough so that transforming me into chocolate would do nothing. And you can't eat me since I'm not chocolate enough. I vacuum all your tea, and crush Pandapowah against you, and for the giggles I throw Powah and his panda to the Spiky Valley of No return, not even if you can fly or teleport.
 
Using sorcery, I switched locations with you. Now I'm blissfully sitting on the throne with my panda while you're starving to death in the Spiky Valley of No return.
And just for the giggles, I used a spell to summon a drought and let out a pack of hungry wolves in the valley.
 
Thank you for giving me food and water for a year. I can eat the wolves' meat and drik their body's water. And when they run out, I'll eat your panda, which should last anotehr 40 years. And while you weren't looking I took your book of sorcery, so I learned a lot of your tricks. You only can do them without the book since you remember them, and all I have to do is use the sorcery teleport, since even though this is the Spiky Valley of NO RETURN, you returned, and so can I.
 
My panda teleported with me :P

You have returned, but you still haven't done anything to claim the throne. So I froze you into a motionless statue and dumped you at the bottom of an ocean.
 
♠ Is this a rivalry I see? ♠

My panda snaps out of your control and slashes out of your stomach. He then gently carries me back to the throne...hehe I mean MY throne. ;)
 
It was my fake stomach. And he actually was never in my body, you and your panda were tricked to think such. I transform into Wario-Man. Faster, stronger, and I take no damage or get knocked back. Your panda seems like a newborn baby for me. I repeatedly punch him 'till I rip his skin off, reveal his heart, and burn it with my burn machine. I then tackle you to oblivion.
 
:toad: My... panda

Even as Wario-Man you're still not as powerful. I opened a portal and sent you to a dimension of unspeakable horrors, and I close the portal before you do anything tricky to bring me with you.
I sit on the throne mourning about my panda. :'(
 
Luckily, I was wearing my armor... ;D
All 8 of your knives broke.. hehe.. I take out my chainsaw and sawed your legs and hands off. After listening to you beg for mercy, I slowly decapicate you with my trusty chainsaw.
I sit back down on the throne.