The Rise of X

Sorry for the double post, but I have a question. Would you guys like me to use Mastermind Troll vs. Everyone violence?
 
GalacticPetey said:
Sorry for the double post, but I have a question. Would you guys like me to use Mastermind Troll vs. Everyone violence?
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I don't care, as long as my uncredited off-screen cameo is witty.
 
Lord Ghirahim said:
GalacticPetey said:
Sorry for the double post, but I have a question. Would you guys like me to use Mastermind Troll vs. Everyone violence?
Click to expand...
I don't care, as long as my uncredited off-screen cameo is witty.
Click to expand...
I need more than one person's opinion.
 
GalacticPetey said:
Sorry for the double post, but I have a question. Would you guys like me to use Mastermind Troll vs. Everyone violence?
Click to expand...
I read the first bit, got bored, decided to write Exile Vilify.
Short answer: I don't care.
 
Nabber said:
GalacticPetey said:
Sorry for the double post, but I have a question. Would you guys like me to use Mastermind Troll vs. Everyone violence?
Click to expand...
I read the first bit, got bored, decided to write Exile Vilify.
Short answer: I don't care.
Click to expand...
2nd parts better
 
SNEAK PEAK!

Zero was the first to attack. His cybernetic arm extended forward towards X. He grabbed the incoming arm and flipped Zero far behind him. GalacticPetey went Godzilla and shot an atomic ray. X easily deflected it. He flew upwards and kicked him in the gut. Even though he was as tall as average human, his kick sent GP careening down. Pyro, Red's Charizard, and Toad85 tried to fight him in close combat. X launched them all away with one punch. Meanwhile, Zero was beginning to rise. There was a warm liquid in his mouth. He spit out the fresh blood.
"Bastard" he hissed.
He flew over to join his allies. When he got close, X grabbed his head and slammed it into the ground. GalacticPetey got up and slammed his tail into the villain. X was unaffected. He formed an energy blade in his hand. He swung down and GP's tail was cut in half. He screamed in pain and reverted back to Petey form. Pyro got up.
"LET'S TOAST THIS BITCH!" he yelled.

Feedback please
 
Well, it could certainly be a bit more descriptive, and have better use of pronouns (it gets confusing when you keep saying "he".)
I'm glad to see that you're making progress from Super Wiki Story, though.
And on detail, it could go like this:

Pyro, Red's Charizard, and Toad85 gathered in close, trying to fight him with close-quarter combat. Before they could even land a single hit, however, X threw a flying punch, launching them away from him.
 
Thank you GLaDOs, I will except this criticism without hesitation.

(Anyone get DBZ reference I just made)
 
Ooh, that reminds me:
Today in class, the teacher was pulling up files on the computer. She was like, "We have 9000 files... 9001" or something like that and I whispered, "It's over 9000!"
 
GLaDOS said:
Ooh, that reminds me:
Today in class, the teacher was pulling up files on the computer. She was like, "We have 9000 files... 9001" or something like that and I whispered, "It's over 9000!"
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Epic win
 
Would it contain any references to previous works or even other stories or comics that you like. (so pointing to E: RotM)
 
Gino Weinberg said:
Would it contain any references to previous works or even other stories or comics that you like. (so pointing to E: RotM)
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Maybe


Major spoiler
There will be one chapter when Mastermind Troll rises from near death and seeks revenge on the users that nearly killed him in MTvs.E. But then he is easily killed by X
 
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