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Currently nearly crying laughing. At what, you may ask? "Fire hydrants are so useless. They just sit there."

Been super into this song for like a week. Still stand by the fact that these lyrics feel like something out of a ballad.

What did the golfer say when he was deciding what socks to wear? "There's a hole in one."

I know everyone thought Mario Golf: Super Rush was super mediocre but I'm having fun. Honestly though, my favorite part so far is just how styling my Mii is in all the different world outfits. I thought my hoodie was my most iconic outfit but I'm loving the golf outfits.

So one of my friends got married yesterday. I saw that, said "You're not going to be the only happy person around here," and confessed my feelings to my crush. I'm not quite in a relationship yet but I'm closer than I was before.

I wrote a whole paper on this subject for my literary theory class and got an A on it. My argument was basically that by including Rosalina in so much everything and also giving her "generic princess personality," they completely removed any point to her existence. I'm also not sure why they're...

Recording videos is a lot more fun than I remember but hearing my own voice sucks just as much as I remember.

Only minor apologies to Cycles v2 S for my 0 enjoyment rating because having to hear my ex's really grating voice on the other side of the wall making the experience worse isn't the level's fault, but also the level itself is awful so I'm not that sorry.

The day MK8D gets mods that let me have some level of control over who the CPUs are or where they're placed is the day I finally see happiness.

I do not want to go to my classical rhetoric class tonight but one of my best friends is doing the secondary source presentation and I refuse to miss her.

"Do you wanna ride in my Mercedes, boy?" -Nintendo selling DLC in 2014 (also a song from 1988 but the recontext is funnier)

No. If you got that from the "September 1961," that's just one of the lines that was in the index I had to pick from. I'm 23, going to be 24 in March.

So if you somehow didn't know, I have a degree in English with a minor in creative writing. I've been a writer for over a decade and I have experience in fiction, creative nonfiction (or CNF), poetry, essays, plays, and I'm planning to take a screenwriting class in the fall. I want to pursue my...

There's been some real Jasper R. Redboot bangers to come from my advanced poetry writing class, should I start a thread to share them? E: here it is.

Send your positive energy to the Geode devs so they can get an update out as soon as possible for 2.208, I want to play GD with all my mods on again.

The creator of the GD Randomizer has confirmed that my endless mode run of 1238.24 seconds is the longest he's seen so according to him, I possess the WR in it. E: here's his comment.

The 20:38 run I had on the GD Randomizer makes up for how badly I crashed out on Stalemate.

(beats a new hardest in GD) Maybe I like playing insane demons. (tries to beat Stalemate) Maybe I should never play an insane demon ever again.

Fun fact, this thought process is what led me to make 111 Miis to mod into Wii Sports Club and Miitopia in place of the official Nintendo made CPUs. I started by making a full Mii out of a Deadly Demon from Miitopia and liked how it turned out, so then I made a Mii completely on my own in an...

Does anyone else have Discord (or a phone at all) in their dreams? Apparently some people say there are no phones in dreams but I actively use Discord in my dreams on a regular basis.

Can't believe I start my first grad classes in just three days.

Leave it to someone with a degree in English (and minor in creative writing) to be stressing over whether or not my poem should end with a period or not.

I have a TA friend who says she enjoys teaching 8:00 AM classes and I just want to know how she's built so different because I can't even wake up at 9:00 without being extremely tired, let alone be teaching by then.

Happy to report that even my dreams are calling me Jasper so I'm definitely sticking with that as my name.

"What was the first track in Mario Kart World called? It was, uh... Circuit City." -me, a few minutes ago (it was, in fact, not Circuit City)

Just described the bottom eight characters in the Mario Kart match I'm in as "six and a half humans and Toadette," which also happens to contain the name of my new band, Six and a Half Humans.

I can't wait for my doctor to tell me someday that I have the world's most skewed, barely held together back.

If for some reason you ever need to gaslight your friend into thinking they're bad at Mario Kart, I'll show up to your online match and destroy them for you.

"A Hotel Mario prototype was found at a Goodwill in 2024" is the most ridiculous sentence but apparently it's true.

My year got off to a start equivalent to backfiring at the beginning of a Mario Kart race so I guess the only way to compensate is to start writing a second novel. If the year won't let me have a win off the bat then I'll have to make it happen myself.

Must stay awake for 43 more minutes to properly ring in the new year.

So tired today that I just tried to use telekinesis to hit the home button on my phone.

I just wrote a list of 88 games I would include in a video called something along the lines of "One Useless Fact About Every Mario Game You Know" but the problem is that I'd have to do research because I don't own a bunch of them.