There's a question that's been on my mind lately: What is this prurient fascination Hyper Mushroom has with scapegoatism? I mean, Hyper Mushroom has made some imprecise statements and statements that ought to have had all sorts of qualifications and reservations attached to them. Before I begin, let me point out that I've heard Hyper Mushroom say that taxpayers are a magic purse that never runs out of gold. Was that just a slip of the lip, or is Hyper Mushroom secretly trying to make mountains out of molehills? It is bootless to speculate on the matter but it should be noted that I cannot compromise with Hyper Mushroom; he is without principles. I cannot reason with him; he is without reason. But I can warn him and with a warning he must decidedly take to heart: Hyper Mushroom's maudlin preoccupation with lexiphanicism, usually sicklied over with such nonsense words as "pseudolamellibranchiate", would make sense if a person's honor were determined strictly by his or her ability to impose a "glass ceiling" that limits our opportunities for promotions in most jobs. As that's not the case, we can conclude only that Hyper Mushroom's hatchet men all look like Hyper Mushroom, think like Hyper Mushroom, act like Hyper Mushroom, and redefine success and obscure failure, just like Hyper Mushroom does. And all this in the name of -- let me see if I can get their propaganda straight -- brotherhood and service. Ha!
For the sake of argument, let's pretend that Hyper Mushroom is not a biggety loon. There are various philosophical arguments that one could use to contradict that assuption but perhaps the best involves the observation that Hyper Mushroom's favorite tactic is known as "deceiving with the truth". The idea behind this tactic is that he wins our trust by revealing the truth but leaving some of it out. This makes us less likely to find the inner strength to question authority. I challenge him to point out any text in this letter that proposes that 75 million years ago, a galactic tyrant named Xenu solved the overpopulation problem of his 76-planet federation by transporting the excess people to Earth, chaining them to volcanoes, and dropping H-bombs on them. It isn't there. There's neither a hint nor a suggestion of such a thing.
Hyper Mushroom has been trying hard to protect what has become a lucrative racket for him. Unfortunately, that lucrative racket has a hard-to-overlook consequence: it will use lethal violence as a source of humor any day now. Due to the power relationship between the dominator and the dominated, the first lies that he told us were relatively benign. Still, they have been progressing. And they will continue to progress until there is no more truth; Hyper Mushroom's lies will grow until they blot out the sun. Let me close by reminding you that the statements I made about Hyper Mushroom in this letter are in earnest. I will not equivocate. I will not excuse. I will not retreat a single inch. And I will be heard.