Good wishes aren't always good wishes

Granted, but what would happen to Monty Python and the Holy Grail?

I wish blue whales weren't endangered.
 
Granted, they become extinct.

I wish I could bowl better.
 
Granted, it doesn't work.

I wish November and December didn't have to be so cold.
 
Granted, they're replaced with ridiculously strenuous button mashing games.

I wish Richard Dawson were still alive.
 
Granted, it's unresponsive.

I wish someone would invent a battery that you never had to charge.
 
Granted. It explodes right when it breathes.

I wish I could mod more games.
 
Granted, everyone hates it so you have to get rid of it.

I wish I weren't losing my voice today.
 
Granted. You lose your eyes.

I wish Nintendo wasn't such an assclown.
 
Granted, they get bought out by Microsoft and are forced to ditch all of their past I.Ps.

I wish the Switch presentation would come earlier.
 
Granted, spiders start to infest the earth.

I wish George Michael hadn't died.
 
Granted.

Bob McKenzie takes his place instead.

I wish that Super Mario Run was better.
 
LeftyGreenMario said:
Granted.

Bob McKenzie takes his place instead.

I wish that Super Mario Run was better.
Granted, But you still have to pay the $9.99 fare to make it better.

I wish i had a Time Machine.
 
Granted. It's out of battery and you'll have to time travel to harvest energy from the tongue of C. sanctus.

I wish people would pay attention and take action to curb global warming.
 
Granted, global cooling becomes a thing and we all freeze to death.

I wish people didn't automatically assume I'm right-handed.
 
Granted. You draw the attention of religious fanatics who start harassing you just on your handedness.

I wish Wario had even more ways to die.
 
Granted, he's invulnerable to all of them.

I wish this room I'm in were cooler.
 
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