Recent content by Garth Marenghi

What's up? It's me, your winner from last year. Just popping in to put down some votes and share some wisdom. The important thing is to always stay humble, and never push yourself over your limit. Also, never let anyone look inside your box. I didn't, and look where I am now. I have been given...

NOT SHANE DESCRIPTION "My name's not Shane, kid" – Not Shane Not Shane, or "The Man with No Name", is just a drifter... that's all you need to know. ABILITIES Gunslinger – Skilled with guns & will shoot anyone without a moment's hesitation. He once killed a man's entire gang because...

LASAGNA CAT & ULTIMATE LASAGNA Description Garfield is a funny cat who hates Mondays and loves lasagna! His owner is called Jon and he lives with a dog called Odie. The Ultimate Lasagna has been engineered using the most advanced food hypertechnology. Tuck into its succulent layers of...

Sorry for my lack of participation in today's investigation. I've been working on a new short story... "Art: Attacked". It's about an artist whose art gets attacked by a serial killer, and then when he finds out he gets so mad his head explodes. No correlation. People recently have been asking...

[Enter, as I wish.] Hello, my good man. I'm Garth Marenghi, Archduke o' Darkdom, self-realised Thalassic visionary. Mind if I pop my head in? What's this "ritual" I'm hearing about?

Erm, thanks? I've actually already got one that looks just like... oh. I'll take this back upstairs and put it back where it came from. After that, I think I'll take a relaxing walk down the Promenade. Who are those cabins for, and what's up with that 'Still A Cabin'?

If none of the staff are around, I'd like to covertly check any bookcases in the Lobby, Conference Rooms and Lounge to make sure they're stocked with ample copies of my works. If not, I'll slip in a few I've brought with me - Slicer IV: The Blade is Back, Stump, CRAB!!. Remove some lesser books...

Pleased to hear, Mr. Sholmes. Soon as I walked in, I could tell you were a man o' good taste. And Mr. Hoshizora, was it? Don't worry, I'm used to the odd rabid fan. I could always use a bit of help promoting my new book, if you're up for it? Mind if I take a quick glance at those conference...

Greetings, friends. I'm Garth Marenghi: author... dreamweaver... visionary. Ex-ghost. Current status: Alive, and - besides a dodgy hip - well. When I was asked to attend the AEAEA Conference as a V.I.P., my first question was, why hadn't I been asked before? My second question was, what was the...

Well, I hope you all learned an important lesson today. Your so-called "friends" may make fun of you for carrying around a cardboard box everywhere, but inside this masks a deep-seated desire to know what is in your box. Do not be ashamed if this applies to you. It is only natural. But some may...

Hello! Grandma and Grandpa Box here. We are so proud of our grandson. He has never shown anyone what is inside his box. We fully endorse our grandson. Knock 'em dead junior.

"I'm here to kick ass and carry my box. And I am already carrying my box." BOX GUY is HERE !! Strengths - I have a box! No you cannot look inside. - I can summon more boxes at will. - I can do telekenisis and float. Also I am ripped which helps with that apparently. - I have the physical...

I'm in Same colour as I usually have (camarone) I'll find the hex code in a sec (edit: it's #00581A) Household item: cafetiere