My new EENE fanfic

BloodySimpsonChibi

Goomba
Banned User
The first chapter in my new EENE fanfic. The plot is basically the cast returning 15 years after BPS thanks to a mysterious letter. I'm going on multiple websites so I can get opinions from people about it.

"And that class concludes our lesson for today. I expect to see you all first thing tomorrow morning." As his students disbanded, Eddward picked up his own belongings and left after them. Being a professor at Yale university wasn't all it was cracked up to be. Sure it was the career of his dreams but time and time again, Eddward felt himself missing the good ol days at the Cul-Dee-Sac.

Eddward had grown up surprisingly well. He still had his weak physique but more than made up for it with his intellect. He still wore his hat has he had become accustomed to it. He breezed through collage and after fumbling for a career, decided that his talents would be best put to use molding young minds. He was accepted into Yale and gained quite the reputation as a great teacher. All in all, it was a good life Eddward was leading. But still, what he wouldn't give to see his two childhood friends again.

As he entered his home, he was greeted by his wife, Marie. It amazed Eddward that the girl who tormented his adolescence became his wife. Everything changed in high school. Eddward and Marie fell in love and got married soon after high school. Although there was some turbulence every now and then, it was a happy marriage.

"Hi honey!" Marie said. "How was the class?"

"I'm hard-pressed to say it went well although Tyler Milton has been acting up again." Eddward said has he hung up his coat. "How was Marion today?"

"Well it took all day but I finally put her too sl-

"Daddy!"

Without warning, a little girl with raven hair and a grey dress pounced on Eddward, knocking him to the ground.

"Marion! Get off your father this instant!" Marie shouted. Maryann pouted but obeyed her mother, allowing Eddward to dust himself off. He then scooped the little girl in his arms.

"It's quite alright Marie." He said. "Marion's painful affections are one of the two experiences I look forward to every day."

This is just part of the story. I will publish the whole thing on fanfiction.net. Opinions would be greatly appreciated. I hope you enjoyed it!
 
you spelled the daughter's name two different ways within the first two sentences she appears in
i would understand if her parents were calling her by a nickname while the narration called her by her given name, but marion and maryann are clearly pronounced the same, so it makes no sense to spell it differently
 
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