OFFICIAL FAIL AWARDS XV CEREMONY

Raiko Horikawa

Live your life according to your rhythm!
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Core 'Shroom Staff
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MarioWiki
Superchao
- Fail Awards XV Opening - Superchao
- F1. Worst Power-up - Hooded Pitohui
- F4. Worst Level Concept - Reverse Input
- F8. Worst Remake - Lakituthequick
- F6. Worst Boss Battle - TPG
- F3. Worst Obstacle - Waluigi Time, Cosmic Cowboy, & InsaneBlathers
- F2. Worst Enemy - Zange
- F9. Most Forgettable Game - Superchao
- F7. Most Disappointing Update Cycle - MrConcreteDonkey
- F5. Worst Game Mechanic - Waluigi Time
- F10. Most Shameless Business Decision - Koops
- Fail Awards XV Closing - Superchao
- Bonus Stars - Lakituthequick
 
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Camwoodstock

always lurking in the shadows in appreciation
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her/him (&)
MarioWiki
Camwood777
Mario has had a rocky transition ever since he grabbed the Boulder Mushroom and now every pipe visibly quakes on impact
 

Raiko Horikawa

Live your life according to your rhythm!
Forum Moderator
Chat Operator
Core 'Shroom Staff
Awards Committee
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He/him
MarioWiki
Superchao
Hello, Awards readers! It’s Superchao, as always somehow around this, bringing you the fail awards. You know, we may call them the fail awards, but these are done out of love, after all - if you care about something, you’ll always be aware of its flaws, and what are discussing flaws but a way to wish they were better and ideal? There’s no such thing as a perfect series, after all.

Except for my personal favorites, which are objectively above all possible criticism. But that’s different.

Anyhow, please enjoy our ten celebrations of the worst of the worst! I know I will!

Up next is Hooded Pitohui! with F1 - Worst Power-up!!
 

Hooded Pitohui

The Bird with Batrachotoxin!
Core 'Shroom Staff
Awards Committee
Poll Committee
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He/him
MarioWiki
Hooded Pitohui
Pssssst! Pssssst! 'Ey, Mario! This way!


Grueling journey, getting through this fortress without a chance to restock, ain't it? Lucky for you, I snuck in here to help you out. I snatched some prime power-ups from the storage rooms here. 'Course, much as I want to help you, I can't just give these away. Gotta charge a convenience fee for sticking my neck out to come help you, don't I?

Huh? Whuzzat? You don't think I'm really a Toad? Sure I am! It's me, Schiff T. Look at me, I've got the mushroom cap and everything. Hail the Princess and all that jazz. Long live the Mushroom Kingdom. Go, go Mari-ohhhh, you get the picture.

Don't worry your pretty little mustachioed head! Just buy what you need while there's time!

Wuzzat? You've got your eyes on this #5: Weird Mushroom? 'Course you'd want this! You've been chowing down on these blocky orange-and-red mushrooms since '85! Crushing… Goombas… and hitting them off of blocks… The odd shape? Don't worry about it! This is your standard, run-off-the-mill make-you-bigger mushroom. It's not like you'll slip around after you eat it, or hit your head on unbreakable blocks because you've got a higher jump! And it definitely won't start coming out of blocks randomly so that you aren't expecting to get it! I can sell you this Weird Mushroom for 25 coins, what'd'ya say?

'Ey? You don't want it? I'm only trying to help, here!

Oh, wuzzat? That Skeleton Bird caught your eye? Y'know, I hear this transformed that Wario guy into #4: Zombie Wario when this drooled on him. A little of that undead spit, and I bet my bottom gold coin that you'd transform into Zombie Mario! With all the traps in a fortress like this, it's a great buy! You can beat any Koopa Troop member in your way just by touching them! "Can zombies jump high?" "Can zombies outrun Grinders and Firebars?" You're a card, Mario! 'Course they can! In fact, there's a thin ledge over the lava over there. Why don't you test the new power-up over on it? I'll let you take it off my hands for 30 coins. That's a steal for invincibility!

'Ey? You don't want it? Here I was, trying to help!

Oh, so it's that #3: Super Crown that put that twinkle in your eye? This one's special. Put this on, and you'll feel like a princess, the way you float on air. Two jumps, floating, this crown even pulls you out of a pit one time if you trip up! Sounds like a beaut of a power-up to me! I guarantee this power-up works for anyone! Don't have to be some kinda special Toad to make this do anything for you! For such a valuable power-up, I'll say it's fair to part with it for 40 coins. What'd'ya say?

'Ey? You're busting my spores here! How can I help you if you won't buy anything?

Wuzzat? It's the #2: Mini Mushroom you've been holding out for all this time? Good eye, Mario! Longer jumps, running over water and up walls, fitting in tight spaces, this Mushroom will give you a leg-up! What? You think that it'll make you weaker instead of toughening you up, just because it's puny? That's crazy talk! What kinda mushroom doesn't give you extra power?! Look, this is a good buy, and you never know when you'll find a tiny pipe or opening and regret not picking it up when you've got to backtrack to somewhere that's got these tiny fungi. If you're going to take on Ki- er, Bowser, you're gonna want this, and it can be yours right now for just 45 coins. You taking it?

NO!? Sheesh, Mario, I'm starting to think you don't want my help!

Alright, so it's this #1: Spring Mushroom that you want? I should've known from the start. The famous Jumpman would want a power-up that lets him jump higher! This is in high demand, you know? It was even reviewed by an important Mushroom Kingdom general in a newspaper! With this, you can take giant spring leaps and ground pound through stone! It's handy around precarious ledges and traps like lava! Big jumps will get you right over them! Just get really close to the edges of platforms. Remember that! Since this is such a valuable power-up, and I snatched it from the Koopa Troop for you, how about 50 coins?

STILL NO?! I'm starting to think you won't buy anything! Let's give it up, fellow Goombas, and show this plumber what's for!

ATTAAAAAAAACK!

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Spring Mushroom26719.31%
2Mini Mushroom17612.73%
3Super Crown15911.50%
4Zombie Wario1289.26%
5Weird Mushroom (SMM)1148.24%
6Light Box836.00%
7Power Balloon775.57%
8Frog Suit674.84%
9Expresso493.54%
10Wing Cap463.33%
11Blue Shell (NSMB)412.96%
12Yoshi (SMS)312.24%
13Snowman Wario302.17%
14Super Hammer (SMM2)221.59%
15Dash Pepper201.45%
15Mole Tank201.45%
17Boo Mushroom181.30%
18Blimp Fruit130.94%
19O. Bee Mushroom20.14%
19O. Cannon Box20.14%
19O. Metal Cap20.14%
19O. Super Mushroom20.14%
19O. Vanish Cap20.14%
24O. Gold Flower10.07%
24O. Goomba Mask10.07%
24O. Hammer Suit10.07%
24O. Invincibility Leaf10.07%
24O. Master Sword (SMM2)10.07%
24O. P-Wing (SM3DL)10.07%
24O. Red POW Box10.07%
24O. Spin Drill10.07%
24O. Super Acorn10.07%
24O. Super Bell10.07%
24O. Super Star10.07%
24O. Superball Flower10.07%
Total Votes: 1383
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is Reverse Input with F4 - Worst Level Concept!
 

Revin

Ace Captain
MarioWiki
Reverse Input
Hello, everyone! There's nothing anyone hates more than stupid level gimmicks... So, naturally, I've taken the top three winners, thrown them all into a single Super Mario Maker 2 level, and uploaded it for you all to "enjoy". And if you don't have the game, don't worry! You can experience a video playthrough just below.

LEVEL CODE: D06-0LJ-B7G

Congratulations to our top three, dark / low vision levels, restrictively low timers, and autoscrolling levels!

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Autoscrolling levels22915.56%
2Restrictively low timers18412.50%
3Dark/low vision levels1328.97%
4Cappyless/F.L.U.D.D.less missions1037.00%
5Automatic levels (SMM)966.52%
6100 Coin Stars/Shine Sprites (SM64/SMS)946.39%
7Checkpointless challenges916.18%
7Water levels916.18%
9Star Ball galaxies674.55%
10Roshambo Temples (PM:CS)634.28%
11Ghost Houses583.94%
12"Secret of _" levels (SMS)573.87%
13Blast the Fury Blocks (SM3DW+BF)493.33%
14Surfing galaxies442.99%
15Purple Coin levels372.51%
16Red Coin missions (SMS)241.63%
17Ice levels231.56%
18O. Refreshing levels (SMM)50.34%
19O. Bubble galaxies40.27%
20O. Dark/low vision water levels30.20%
21O. Cosmic Clone levels (SM3DL)20.14%
22O. "Little Timmy" levels (SMM/SMM2)10.07%
22O. Being trapped in an area until a certain plot point10.07%
22O. Blooper-surfing (SMS)10.07%
22O. Bramble levels (DKC series)10.07%
22O. Casino levels10.07%
22O. Daredevil Comet10.07%
22O. Desert levels10.07%
22O. Enemy defeating clear conditions (SMM2)10.07%
22O. Levels with little safe ground10.07%
22O. Levels with no challenge (SMM)10.07%
22O. Mazes10.07%
22O. No jumping levels (SMM)10.07%
22O. Silver Stars10.07%
22O. Time Trials (MKT)10.07%
22O. Troll levels (SMM)10.07%
22O. World 1-1 remakes (SMM)10.07%
Total Votes: 1472
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is Lakituthequick with F8 - Worst Remake!
 

Lakituthequick

Celestial Guide
Core 'Shroom Staff
Awards Committee
Pronouns
He/him
3. Super Mario 3D All-Stars

"Between Super Mario Galaxy 1 and 2, the second one is generally considered better, so Super Mario Galaxy 2 should return in a compilation game." - Nintendo: "1. Take it or leave it."


Call plopping three games on a disk lazy but at least they added a music player, I guess.

2. Super Mario All-Stars Limited Edition

We should copy Super Mario All-Stars and paste it on the Wii


At least 3D All-Stars had a slight bit of effort in updating graphics to suit the platform.

1. Super Mario Maker for Nintendo 3DS

Smart: Porting a highly popular game from the Wii U to Nintendo 3DS, so more people can enjoy making their own Mario levels - Dumb: The port does not allow people to share levels with others online, which was the main draw of the original game, instead relying on StreetPass


Did anyone even still use StreetPass in 2016?

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Super Mario Maker for Nintendo 3DS38226.40%
2Super Mario All-Stars Limited Edition19913.75%
3Super Mario 3D All-Stars15810.92%
4Diddy Kong Racing DS1399.61%
4New Super Mario Bros. U Deluxe1399.61%
6Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story + Bowser Jr.'s Journey1369.40%
7Super Mario 64 DS563.87%
8Luigi's Mansion (3DS)533.66%
9Super Mario Bros. Deluxe432.97%
10Super Mario Advance372.56%
11Super Mario World: Super Mario Advance 2312.14%
12Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga + Bowser's Minions292.00%
13Mario Kart 8 Deluxe211.45%
14Yoshi's Island: Super Mario Advance 3201.38%
15O. All Night Nippon: Super Mario Bros.10.07%
15O. Donkey Kong Country 2 (GBA)10.07%
15O. Super Mario 64: Shindō Pak Taiō Version10.07%
15O. Super Mario Advance 4: Super Mario Bros. 310.07%
Total Votes: 1447
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is TPG with F6 - Worst Boss Battle!
 

TPG+

from deltarune
Core 'Shroom Staff
Poll Committee
Pronouns
He/Him/His
Disclaimer: this content may only have entertainment value to me and me alone



#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Boom Boom (Super Mario series)25620.29%
2Bowser (SMB)1229.67%
3Eely-Mouth (SMS)846.66%
4Big Cheep Cheep (PM:SS)806.34%
5Polterkitty (LM3)755.94%
6Steak (PM:CS)655.15%
7Gobblegut (fiery) (SMG2)604.75%
8Cloud N. Candy (YS)594.68%
9Zeekeeper (M&L:DT)574.52%
10Major Burrows (SMG)564.44%
11Bowser (SMG2)534.20%
12Clem (LM3)463.65%
13Bonechill (SPM)383.01%
14King Boo (LM3)362.85%
15The Shy Bandit (PM:CS)302.38%
16Topmaniac (SMG)282.22%
17Shadoo (SPM)171.35%
18Catbat (WL4)151.19%
19O. Bouldergeist (SMG)30.24%
19O. Bowser (PM:SS)30.24%
19O. Fawful Express (M&L:BIS)30.24%
19O. King Ka-thunk (SM3DW)30.24%
23O. Big Bully (SM64)20.16%
23O. Bowser (SMS)20.16%
23O. Elder Princess Shroob (M&L:PiT)20.16%
23O. Gooper Blooper (PM:SS)20.16%
23O. Huff N. Puff (PM)20.16%
23O. King Olly (PM:TOK)20.16%
23O. Lord Fredrik (DKC:TF)20.16%
23O. Mandibug Stack (SMG)20.16%
23O. Mechawiggler (SMO)20.16%
23O. Wingo (CT:TT)20.16%
33O. Anti Guy (PM)10.08%
33O. Baron Brrr (SMG)10.08%
33O. Big Bowser (SMM)10.08%
33O. Bonetail (PM:TTYD)10.08%
33O. Boss Sumo Bro. (NSMBU)10.08%
33O. Bowcien (MTA)10.08%
33O. Bowser (M&L:BIS)10.08%
33O. Bowser (NSMB)10.08%
33O. Bowser (SMG)10.08%
33O. Bowser (SMO)10.08%
33O. Bowser (YNI)10.08%
33O. Bowser in the Sky (SM64)10.08%
33O. Bowser Jr. and Paper Bowser Jr. (M&L:PJ)10.08%
33O. Cackletta's Soul (M&L:SS)10.08%
33O. Cheepskipper (NSMB)10.08%
33O. Chef Soulfflé (LM3)10.08%
33O. Count Bleck (SPM)10.08%
33O. Dark Bowser (M&L:BIS)10.08%
33O. Fake Bowser (SMB:TLL)10.08%
33O. Fake Bowser (SMR)10.08%
33O. Fracktail (SPM)10.08%
33O. Hisstocrat (SM3DW)10.08%
33O. Ice Vellumental (PM:TOK)10.08%
33O. Kamek (M&L:DT)10.08%
33O. King Boo (SMS)10.08%
33O. King Lakitu (SMG2)10.08%
33O. Knucklotec (SMO)10.08%
33O. Lemmy Koopa (NSMBU)10.08%
33O. Ludwig von Koopa (NSMBU)10.08%
33O. Ludwig von Koopa (NSMBW)10.08%
33O. Madame Broode (SMO)10.08%
33O. Megahammer (SMG2)10.08%
33O. Meowser (SMM2)10.08%
33O. Miss Petunia (LM)10.08%
33O. Mollusque-Lanceur (SMO)10.08%
33O. Monty Mole (SMS)10.08%
33O. Motley Bossblob (SM3DW)10.08%
33O. Mummipokey (NSMB)10.08%
33O. Pi'illodium (M&L:DT)10.08%
33O. Pom Pom (SM3DW)10.08%
33O. Reznor (SMW/NSMB2)10.08%
33O. Shadow Mario (SMS)10.08%
33O. Shoot (WL3)10.08%
33O. Shrewd Possessor (LM:DM)10.08%
33O. Smithy (SMRPG)10.08%
33O. Sorbetti (SMG2)10.08%
33O. Spewart (SMO)10.08%
33O. Squizzard (SMG2)10.08%
33O. Super Dimentio (SPM)10.08%
33O. Topper (SMO)10.08%
33O. Wart (SMB2)10.08%
33O. Water Vellumental (PM:TOK)10.08%
33O. Yaridovich (SMRPG)10.08%
Total Votes: 1262
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is Waluigi Time, Cosmic Cowboy, & InsaneBlathers with F3 - Worst Obstacle!
 

Shmaluigi

All-Star
Core 'Shroom Staff
Awards Committee
Poll Committee
Retired Wiki Staff
Pronouns
He/him
The private investigator biz around here is a tough one. If you're me, at least. I like to call myself the great Shmwario, but it seems like I'm always the last guy anyone wants to hire in this city. Hurts my ego and my wallet at the same time! Bah! Well, I figured if I wanted to pay the bills, I'd probably better set up another side hustle. No problem, I'd done plenty of 'em before, and this time, I had a real great one up my sleeve! Treasure huntin'! I nab half of the profits from each job, and I'll be filthy rich! Maybe I'll even get to buy a neat penthouse soon and look down on my brother's dinky little office. So I ran an ad in The 'Shroom - Shmwario, Private Investigator and Treasure Hunter!

Then one afternoon, I was snoozin' on the couch when I got woken up by someone walkin' through the door to my office.

"Excuse-a me, Mr. Shmwario? It’s a me, erm, Shmario!"

"Hm? Eh? What?"

I took a sec to fully wake up and rub that weird overnight crud outta my eyes. Then I saw who was standin' in my office - some weird lookin' guy in a black cloak. Didn't get a good look at their face, but I thought I saw a mustache at least. Now, if I'm bein' honest, someone coverin' their identity with a cloak like that seemed like bad news, but if I'm bein' even more honest, I didn't really care! My little bro's kind of a goody two-shoes, but I don't mind walkin' that morally gray line from time to time for some cold hard cash. Cha-ching!

"Shmwario, private investigator and/or treasure hunter at your service! What'll it be?"

"See, I have a problem that only you and an unspecified amount of your buddies can solve! See, I've been hearing rumors of a mysterious temple, which I doubt is a trap for schmucks like yourself, and, seeing as you're a treasure hunter, I think this will be perfect for doing evil things to you! Uh- and by evil things, I mean...you get to explore a temple! Hahahahahaha how fun is that???"

"Mystery temple, eh? You've come to the right place! You good with the 50/50 split on the profits?" I asked.

"Yeeeeeeeah sure, just go as soon as you can."

Alright, my first treasure huntin' job! But it occurred to me that maybe I should get a couple of other suckers to deal with the real dangerous parts...



"So, whaddaya think?"

"Are you certain on this?" Posh Kermit asked. "You should always do background checks on clients. You never know their true intentions. Trust me, I would know."

"Yeah, er, I'm with Kermit on this," Detective Luigi said. "Besides, if I'm not home in time for dinner, Yuri is gonna get real snippy with me!"

"Oh c'mon! It'll be good, uh, life experience, yeah," I replied, "and besides, I'll give you guys 25% of the profit!"

That may sound pretty generous... but I didn't say whose half that 25% was comin' out of! Bahaha!

"25%...? Well, I do need the money..."

"Well... this all seems incredibly sketchy, but you're the first job offer I've received in weeks, so I'd rather not squander the opportunity."

Weeks? Man, where does this guy rate... Frog puppet guys are gettin' more business than me! Come on!

"Great, you guys probably won't regret it! Now all I gotta do before we leave is replace my detective's getup with some treasure huntin' duds."


Our plane landed deep in the Awazon basin, and after a short walk, there was that big ol' temple, just waiting for the great Shmwario - and his damage sponge chumps, I guess - to go plunder it!

"Ain't she a thing of beauty? I can practically smell the treasure from here."

"...all I can smell is your garlic breath..."

"If I lose any stuffing in here, I trust it will be coming out of your cut?"

"Alright, I'm already gettin' impatient. Let's go! Uh, who wants to go in first?"

"I nominate the plumber," Kermit said. Now that's a plan I could get behind!

"What- ME?! Oh, no- nonono! I, uh, I get a bad case of broken nose whenever I go first into mysterious temples!"

"Okay, fine, we'll draw straws! You guys are lucky I came prepared."

I got the straws ready, and it occurred to me that I should probably rig 'em, but I didn't really know how. Anyway, the frog went first, then green bean, and I got stuck with what was left. I looked at mine, and... "Bwahaha, not it! Alright, who got the short one?"

"Awww, c'mon!! Why does this always happen to me?!"

"Then let's hurry up already!" I exclaimed.

We went on inside, Luigi leadin' the charge, kind of. Lookin' around the place, it felt like I was in an old action flick. In the moment, I thought that I could get used to this - then the floor started to give way and collapse beneath us, dropping all of us right in a pit of quicksand!


"Ah crud!" I cried. "This is how it ends, isn't it? I blame Luigi!"

"NOOOOOOO!!! NOOOO I DON'T WANNA DIEEEEEEEE!!!" Luigi screamed, thrashing around violently.

"I would advise you not to flail your arms about. It typically causes you to sink faster than you would otherwise, which is not a good look."

And then as if things weren't bad enough, I got a mouthful of quicksand! Blech! Lemme tell you, quicksand tastes terrible! I'd rather have a quick sandwich.

As the quicksand started to cover my glorious mustache, suddenly I realized... we weren't actually sinking anymore.

"This is... actually not very deep, however," Kermit noted.

We waded to the edge of the pit, and were able to climb out pretty easily.

"Man, I don't wanna know what happens when you swallow that stuff," I said. Oh well, that was a problem for future Shmwario.


"WHAT?!"

The mysterious figure from before was watching our 'heroes', his teeth gritted.

"The quicksand didn't take them out?! Oh, whatever, this next trap will get them for sure!! Besides, what's scarier than a black hole? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA- ha, haha...ah evil laugh..."


Despite the whole quicksand sitch, we pressed on deeper into the temple, our resolve stronger than ever! At least it was, 'til we found a dead end.

"Oh, it's a dead end. Oh well, looks like we gotta go home now- like, right now, preferably!" Luigi said. What a chicken!

"No problem, I got this one! Let the great Shmwario handle it." Then I ran into the wall with one of my famous shoulder barges! BAM!

Okay, so maybe that didn't actually work, and I just did a number on my shoulder. But you didn't hear that from me!

"Hahaha-!! Nice goin' there, Great Gonzales!"

Unfortunately there weren't any jars or vases or anything like that around, otherwise I woulda stuck one over that doofus' head.

"Hey, look over there," Kermit said. "That stone is protruding from the wall. Perhaps it could be worth taking a look?"

"Uh, yeah, I noticed that too. Just wanted to see if you guys would catch on!" I said, then shoved the frog out of the way to push it myself. The wall started to move away, revealing a secret room! And... was that a black hole?!


"BWAAAAAH!"

"YEEAAAAAOWWWHOHOHOHO!!!!"

We got sucked toward the thing, and I gotta say, I thought that was it! But then I realized I wasn't really that dead.

"Hey, I don't feel that spaghettified. How about you?" I asked Luigi.

"...uh, yeah, actually. I-...I don't feel dead."

"And what's the frog doin' down there?!"

"Observing the rather shoddy paint job on this stage prop. Whoever made this clearly had rather low standards.

...well, of course it's not real. I believe, if there were a real black hole on earth, we would have been well aware of it before we even walked in here."

"Huh, I guess not," I said, then I busted the whole thing up! I punched through the black hole which turned out to be a piece of cardboard obscurin' a comically large magnet. That didn't hold up very well against me either! Shmwario saves the day again!


"WHAT?! Gah- I KNEW I should've gotten a real black hole...somehow! But this will get them for sure- the ultimate mixture of poison and lava: LASION!! Er... Poiva? Uh... Posion Lava. Yeah, that sounds good."


We moved on and found the least ancient temple door ever. Just this wooden door, hangin' open.

The frog stared at it for a second. "The door is ajar."

"Whaddaya mean the door is a jar?" I replied, pointing out how stupid he was bein'. "The door's clearly a door!"

I pulled the door open and then some bucket of liquid came down on me, and I don't really know what happened next, but I think it was something like this.



Anyway, next thing I know, my face is smacked up against a wall. So, whatever I guess. I decided for all of us that we should just ignore that and move on, so move on we did! The next room was a cakewalk, though! I'd even go so far to say it was a breeze!


"MAMMMAA MIAAAAAAAAA!! The gust's too strong- I'M A GONER!!"

"Gah! I don't do very well in gales such as this!"

"Oh come on you guys, it ain't that bad!" I said, turnin' around and seeing those two getting blown around every which way. "Fine, I'll take care of it, as usual."

I walked through the hall while those guys kept bein' all melodramatic and such, approaching the giant fan at the end, then I turned it off. Shmwario saves the day again, again! Man, am I cool or what?

"Come on guys, I got a good feelin' the treasure's just up ahead!"

We ran ahead into a very treasurey lookin' room with a small treasure chest on a pedestal in the middle. I mean, if I was an ancient civilization hiding treasure, this is where I would hide it, you know? I ran up to the chest and opened it, and...


"What? This is just a bunch of junky old mushrooms!"

If you're into Poison and Rotten Mushrooms I guess it would be something, but come on, it's literal death. No thanks! I was about to turn around and go home when some shmuck who looked like Mario showed up outta nowhere.

"AHA! I knew you would come here, Shmwario and company!! I, EVIL MARIO, have succeeded in my master plan to do EVIL THINGS to you all!!"


I wasn't impressed. "Evil Mario? Really?"

"What sort of farce have I stumbled into here?"

"Mari- no, no you're not my brother!! The real Mario would never do something like this!!"

"You see- I wanted to steal this treasure all for myself!! You see, Shmwaridunce, I was the one who hired you to come here, and I set up all of those EVIL traps for you!!"

"But wait, if you wanted the loot, why'd you bother doin' all that?" I asked. "That's just... real dumb!"

"SHUT UP!! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND THE MIND OF A MASTER EVIL-DOER!!"

Then he grabbed the treasure chest and gobbled down one of the Poison Mushrooms. A few seconds later, he dropped the whole thing and fell to the floor in a ball, clutching his stomach.

"GRK- N- No... my plan... my evil plan... RUINED!!"

"Well, this sucked. C'mon guys, let's get outta here."


Back out in the fresh air, we started making the walk back to our plane.

"We learned something of great import today... uh, I think," Kermit said.

"Oh c'mon, sometimes a story's just a story! They don't all need to have morals!" I protested. "We learned absolutely nothing!"

"Pfft- yeah, we did. If you ever ask to go treasure hunting- we say no!" Luigi said.

"Oh, ha ha, real funny."

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Poison Mushroom/Rotten Mushroom22917.52%
2Wind15511.86%
3Lava/Poison14110.79%
4Black hole13610.41%
5Quicksand1088.26%
6Freezing water1017.73%
7Fire Bar856.50%
8Toxic cloud654.97%
9Volcanic debris473.60%
10Spike Trap443.37%
11Mine Carts403.06%
11Skewer403.06%
13Roto-Disc251.91%
14Spinner211.61%
15Flamethrower201.53%
16Bolt Lift151.15%
17Grinder141.07%
18O. Bottomless pit30.23%
18O. Hidden blocks30.23%
18O. Water30.23%
21O. Snake Block20.15%
22O. Areas only accessible by Bowser (M&L:BIS)10.08%
22O. Fake doors10.08%
22O. Falling rocks10.08%
22O. Kaizo blocks10.08%
22O. Pendulum10.08%
22O. Pulse Beam10.08%
22O. Slippery floor10.08%
22O. Thorns (Yoshi series)10.08%
22O. Time limit10.08%
22O. Traffic vehicles (Mario Kart series)10.08%
Total Votes: 1307
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is Zange with F2 - Worst Enemy!
 

Ai Hoshino

The world's greatest idol~!
Core 'Shroom Staff
Pronouns
They/them
MarioWiki
Zange

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Hammer Bros.21816.21%
2Fuzzies1319.74%
3Bloopers1208.92%
4Big Berthas1108.18%
5Cursyas1027.58%
6Lakitus886.54%
7Porcupuffers826.10%
8Urban Stingbies725.35%
9Ukikis/Grinders (SMW2:YI)685.06%
10Bandits433.20%
10Parabones433.20%
12Boos423.12%
12Rocky Wrenches423.12%
12Wizzerds423.12%
15Goombas362.68%
16Burrbos332.45%
17Fangs100.74%
18O. Cheep Chomps50.37%
19O. Chinchos30.22%
19O. Magikoopas30.22%
21O. Bob-ombs20.15%
21O. Cheep Cheeps20.15%
21O. Goombrats20.15%
21O. Mini Goombas20.15%
21O. Monty Moles20.15%
21O. Pionpi20.15%
27O. Ant Troopers10.07%
27O. Back Cursyas10.07%
27O. Block Boos10.07%
27O. Blue Beach Koopas10.07%
27O. Boomerang Bros.10.07%
27O. Boss Basses10.07%
27O. Bowser10.07%
27O. Bunmawashi Dolls10.07%
27O. Cataquacks10.07%
27O. Chargin' Chucks10.07%
27O. Dry Bones10.07%
27O. Flipbugs10.07%
27O. Green Spiny Eggs (SMB3)10.07%
27O. Heave-Hos10.07%
27O. Jack O'Goombas10.07%
27O. Kleptos10.07%
27O. Koopa Troopas10.07%
27O. Kopters10.07%
27O. Kritters10.07%
27O. Magiblots10.07%
27O. Magnet Sparkies10.07%
27O. Maw-Rays10.07%
27O. Ninjis (PM:SS)10.07%
27O. Para-Beetles10.07%
27O. Pokeys10.07%
27O. Rammerheads10.07%
27O. Scuttlebugs10.07%
27O. Shy Guys10.07%
27O. Spikes10.07%
27O. Spiny Cheep Cheeps10.07%
27O. Strollin' Stus10.07%
27O. Swoops10.07%
27O. Thunder Lakitus10.07%
27O. Ty-foos10.07%
27O. Undergrunts10.07%
27O. Urchins10.07%
27O. Wind Spirits10.07%
27O. Winged Strollin' Stus10.07%
27O. X-Yuxes10.07%
27O. Zombies (WL3)10.07%
Total Votes: 1345
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is Superchao with F9 - Most Forgettable Game!
 

Raiko Horikawa

Live your life according to your rhythm!
Forum Moderator
Chat Operator
Core 'Shroom Staff
Awards Committee
Pronouns
He/him
MarioWiki
Superchao
Welcome, one and all, to the Most Forgettable Game presentation! Or, uh. Well. We kind of couldn't remember any of the nominees. So we wrote them all down on cards! But there was an accident getting here, and now we've mixed up all the cards.

Could you do us all a favor, and help us sort them out?

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Mario Party-e29920.13%
2Puzzle & Dragons: Super Mario Bros. Edition1338.96%
3Mario Tennis: Ultra Smash1258.42%
4Yoshi916.13%
5WarioWare: Snapped!785.25%
6Mario Sports Superstars644.31%
6Yoshi Touch & Go644.31%
8Dance Dance Revolution: Mario Mix604.04%
9Yoshi Topsy-Turvy593.97%
10Mario Pinball Land573.84%
11Dr. Mario 64553.70%
12Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story + Bowser Jr.'s Journey493.30%
13Mario + Rabbids Sparks of Hope442.96%
14Mario & Luigi: Paper Jam432.90%
14Mario Party: Star Rush432.90%
16Wario: Master of Disguise422.83%
17DK: Jungle Climber402.69%
18Mario Party Advance322.15%
18Poochy & Yoshi's Woolly World322.15%
20Mario Golf: World Tour130.88%
21O. Mario Clash30.20%
21O. Mario Golf: Super Rush30.20%
21O. Mario Kart 8 Deluxe30.20%
21O. Super Mario Bros.: The Lost Levels30.20%
21O. Yoshi's Crafted World30.20%
26O. Dr. Mario: Miracle Cure20.13%
26O. Mario Party: Island Tour20.13%
26O. Mario's Time Machine20.13%
26O. Paper Mario: Color Splash20.13%
26O. Yoshi's New Island20.13%
26O. Yoshi's Safari20.13%
32O. DK: King of Swing10.07%
32O. Dr. Luigi10.07%
32O. Dr. Mario World10.07%
32O. Hotel Mario10.07%
32O. Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story10.07%
32O. Mario & Luigi: Dream Team10.07%
32O. Mario & Sonic at the London 2012 Olympic Games10.07%
32O. Mario & Sonic at the Sochi 2014 Olympic Winter Games10.07%
32O. Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle10.07%
32O. Mario Bros.10.07%
32O. Mario is Missing!10.07%
32O. Mario Kart 710.07%
32O. Mario Kart 810.07%
32O. Mario Party 1010.07%
32O. Mario Party 310.07%
32O. Mario Party 910.07%
32O. Mario Party Superstars10.07%
32O. Mario Strikers: Battle League10.07%
32O. Mario Tennis Open10.07%
32O. Mario vs. Donkey Kong: Minis on the Move10.07%
32O. Mario vs. Donkey Kong: Tipping Stars10.07%
32O. Mario's Early Years! Preschool Fun10.07%
32O. Mario's Egg Catch10.07%
32O. Mini Mario & Friends: amiibo Challenge10.07%
32O. New Super Mario Bros. 210.07%
32O. Paper Mario10.07%
32O. Paper Mario: Sticker Star10.07%
32O. Paper Mario: The Origami King10.07%
32O. Super Mario 6410.07%
32O. Super Mario Bros.10.07%
32O. Super Mario Odyssey10.07%
32O. Super Paper Mario10.07%
32O. Super Princess Peach10.07%
32O. Tetris Attack10.07%
32O. Yoshi (GB)10.07%
Total Votes: 1485
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is MrConcreteDonkey with F7 - Most Disappointing Update Cycle!
 

Nathan Fielder

Business Expert
Chat Operator
Retired Forum Mod
Retired Wiki Staff
Former 'Shroom Staff
F7 - Most Disappointing Update Cycle
Hi everyone! MCD here, and welcome to THE most invigorating presentation of the night. Oh man... 'I can't wait to find out which game has the most disappointing update cycle'. I bet you just said those exact words.

Look. I've been presenting awards for this community for 12 years now. I think I missed one year, maybe. And writing this award has given me time to reflect. Time to reflect on everything I've ever done as part of the Mario Awards, over 12 whole years.

It's all been terrible. Awful. Up to and including this year. I've made so many mistakes.

Thankfully, it doesn't matter how many mistakes you make or corners you cut when you release something - you can always just patch them out!

10) F8: Worst Baby (2011)

OK, yeah, this one... this one is rough. It's a bit mean to declare anything as the "worst baby".

I think I realise the problem though. I didn't add enough people to the presentation.


There we go. That's a solid cast of characters. Problem solved.

9) F7: Worst Enemy (2012)

This one is gone. Lost to the ether. Somebody I trusted betrayed me.


If I remember correctly, in this presentation I forced Smasher to fight a bunch of small-time crooks and she got sent to Super Paper Mario world, and I also threw Perch with such a strength that he just sort of kept going forever?

But I was a fool for making this about enemies. That's why in version 2.0, this presentation will be about collecting coins. Unfortunately, all of the sprites I used to make this presentation have also vanished, so I will need to improvise.


This new content will cost £2.50 per panel. If you have read this far, you owe me £7.50.

8) U3: Favourite Comic (2013)

What kind of comic is this? Random panels mixed with text, two conflicting art styles, relentless product placement on McDonald's behalf? And then he expects us to believe everyone just drops dead at the end?

Clearly what this presentation needs is the Booster Comics Pass, which will increase the number of panels by 48. This will put you back £22.50, so your updated bill is now £30.00.

Come to think of it, I am concurrently running my comic "MCD Goes to McDonald's"... maybe I could just import some panels from that? I doubt people will notice the lower quality of the panels or writing.



7) A28: Favourite Boss (2014)

Version 2.0 adds a new post credits sequence that wraps up the events of this presentation nicely, and also adds a hook for the sequel. Check it out:

Luigi removes the final brick and emerges from the Mushroom Kingdom Prison sewers, a look of revenge strewn across his face.

"That damn brat, Bowser Jr... Killing my brother... He'll pay... I'll make him pay..."

"Oh, Mr. Luigi! We solved the crime and arrested Bowser Jr. You're free to go."

"Wait, I- I just... escaped... When did he confess?"

"Just a few minutes ago. Lucky because if he hadn't, I would've had to arrest you for escaping from prison. But now you've just climbed through a sewer on your own volition, which is not pleasant for you but not illegal."

"Could this day get any worse?"

"You don't know the half of it, pal."

"Huh? Who are you?"

"Not important. But here - check out what they've done to Puzzle & Dragons: Super Mario Bros. Edition."

The mystery man pulls out his 3DS and shows Luigi.

"Score Attack is heavily revamped: instead of having three courses, it is now split between two modes: Fixed Challenge and Free Challenge with five courses each. Players can view replays of their own runs or from other players around the world. Low-tier enemies, mid-tier enemies, and King Coin Coffers have also received new Awoken Skills, a feature once exclusive to top-tier enemies, Boom Boom, the Koopalings, and Bowser Jr.. There are also forty-one additional teammates that the player can use, increasing the total amount of teammates from 137 to 178: five forms for Mario and Luigi (Rock, Double, Metal, Gold, and Boomerang) that are unlocked from the Score Attack courses, two forms for Gold Goomba (Gold 2-Goomba Tower and Gold 3-Goomba Tower), three forms for each Magikoopa color, and two mutually exclusive forms for each Koopaling that pair them up with normal enemies. Find out more at mariowiki.com."

"Wow, that's probably the 7th most disappointing update I can imagine."

"Yes. 41 people can't be wrong. Come on, we've got work to do.."

Riveting, right?

6) F4: Worst Paper Mario Sidekick (2015)

Yeah, the problem with this one sticks out like a sore thumb. The idea of using paper sprites to present a Paper Mario award, I can live with. But the entire comic is set against a beige carpet. Where is this meant to take place? The desert?

In an ideal world, I would have released this presentation with the background included. Thankfully, with the power of DLC, I can patch in new courses for myself and Smasher to battle in. Plus let's throw in some more new characters, why not?


There we go. Yes all of these lines of dialogue are taking place in completely different settings. This is why the original background didn't suffice.

5) U4: Favourite User Design (2016)

This presentation is far, far too long. Therefore I have decided to add EASY MODE to this presentation so you can get to the crux of the story easily.

"Who's stealing the awards?"
"Me"
"Me also"
"Same here"
"Oh, okay"

You can also... uh, let's see here... you can also play your own music while reading the presentation, and you can play as Daisy.

4) C14: 'Shroom Person of the Year 2016-2017 (2017)

A presentation about me, struggling to come up with a good idea for a presentation.The problem here is both clear and obvious. I should have put Luigi in this.

But fear not, I have patched in a new scene where a familiar face turns up in the 'Shroom HQ.

The 'Shroom: Luigi Realm

Wow! Luigi! What are you doing here, in The 'Shroom HQ?
Hey MCD, thanks for popping by! Want to play Luigi's Balloon Game?
Want to try to pop a balloon that's really far away?
Sure! That sounds fun.
...Can I play as you?
...No. Why?
Well... it's just, seeing as you're here... it would be nice to play as you.
Oh. Sorry.
So, uh... Got any new levels to show me?
No.
Any ideas for my presentation?
No. Just balloons.

YES!! He loves his balloons!!

3) M9: Favourite Add-On Content (2020)

My approach here was far, far too uncritical. A consequence of stan culture is the demonisation of any sort of negative review. In an attempt to combat this, I will review my LEAST FAVOURITE episode of Everybody Loves Mario.

It's a shame the show was cancelled with little fanfare, and now in the wake of that big Illumination mess is all-but-forgotten. They brought back at least three actors from the dead. Damn the Minions to hell, and Gru can fuck off also.



#-1: Mario Gets Internet (S2E2)

In this episode, it's revealed Mario - despite living in his apartment with Luigi for three years - had never set up his internet. Why? Who knows? So Peach and Yoshi help him set it up and then the entire episode is just Mario sitting at his computer, occasionally reacting to stuff. The most bizarre part is that Clippy (special guest Timothée Chalamet) pops up from time-to-time to give him some tips - but he's not even a Mario character, and he doesn't even look like the real Clippy. I can commend this episode for trying something experimental, but my god, what a bizarre mess this whole thing is.

2) M11: Favourite Game Mechanic (2022)
'


Boo! It's me, Shigeru Miyamoto, coming at you live from the year 2078. You may remember that last year, at this very event, I announced a very exciting new Mario game with a very long title I can't remember. Me and my new Research & Development Team (the last one was stolen by hackers) have been hard at work in the big Nintendo and we have finally figured out how to release DLC in the future without it becoming sentient. Want to know what we're working on? Here's a sneaky peek.



Whoa! Who's that? Just kidding, it's Mario!



This is the special Mystery Mushroom; a special, mysterious mushroom that will allow Mario to change into anyone he owns a small plastic figure of. Just imagine the possibilities...



This item will not be appearing in the game.



Instead, Mario now has a new job in the exciting field of URBAN PLANNING. You can work his 8-hour shifts in real time, creating new "worlds" and placing "Piranha Plants" and other obstacles. This will help teach players of the inevitability of work and the back-breaking stress that comes with it, and distract from that stupid Mushroom that makes him turn into somebody else.



Shut up, Mario! Nobody cares!

1) F7: Most Disappointing Update Cycle (2023)

Oh yes. That's right. Even THIS presentation is in severe need of a day-one patch.

NEW CHARACTERS



NEW STADIUMS



That's all I've got for this one. Wow, that really is a disappointing ending. Really puts things into perspective.

But I was wrong. I shouldn't be calling my past work "terrible", and none of these updates I've made have improved anything. There's always going to be mistakes or things I wish I'd done differently, but we need to learn to live with our mistakes.

And maybe a game's update cycle might be "disappointing", because certain features are missing, or should have been in the game from day one - but isn't that better than none at all?

Mario Strikers Battle League received almost twice as many votes as the game in second place, so - at least in this case - that's a pretty solid "no".

You still owe me £30.

Thanks for reading.

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Mario Strikers: Battle League34825.93%
2Super Mario Maker 217513.04%
3Super Mario Party17312.89%
4Super Mario Odyssey1319.76%
5Super Mario Run947.00%
6Mario Golf: Super Rush614.55%
7Puzzle & Dragons: Super Mario Bros. Edition413.06%
8Mario Kart 8 Deluxe372.76%
9New Super Mario Bros. 2362.68%
10Mario Tennis Aces352.61%
11Luigi's Mansion 3342.53%
11Super Mario Maker342.53%
13Mario Kart 8322.38%
14New Super Mario Bros. U292.16%
15Mario Kart Arcade GP DX231.71%
16Mario + Rabbids Sparks of Hope191.42%
16Mario Golf: World Tour191.42%
18Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle141.04%
19O. Mario Kart Tour60.45%
20O. Mario Kart Live: Home Circuit10.07%
Total Votes: 1342
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is Waluigi Time with F5 - Worst Game Mechanic!
 

Shmaluigi

All-Star
Core 'Shroom Staff
Awards Committee
Poll Committee
Retired Wiki Staff
Pronouns
He/him

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Gacha31221.20%
2Content requiring amiibo19413.18%
3Stickers/Battle Cards (PM:SS & PM:CS)1399.44%
4Joystick twirling (MP)1228.29%
5Vehicles (MP9 & MP10)1137.68%
6Must use easy mode character in 4 player mode (NSMBUDX)1117.54%
7Button mashing (Mario Party series)785.30%
8Chance minigames (Mario Party series)734.96%
9Gyroscope/motion controls594.01%
10Camera (3D games)573.87%
11Playing as 9-Volt (WW:GIT!)463.12%
12Non-boss ring battles (PM:TOK)432.92%
13Limited inventory (PM & PM:TTYD)342.31%
14Boilerworks rafting (LM3)261.77%
15Extra life system161.09%
16Dimensional Flipping (SPM)110.75%
17Star Bits (SMG & SMG2)100.68%
18Vibes (SPP)60.41%
19O. Playing as Bowser (M&L:BIS)20.14%
19O. Time limits (Super Mario series)20.14%
21O. Bowser Space (MP7)10.07%
21O. Cappy (SMO)10.07%
21O. Chance Time (Mario Party series)10.07%
21O. Content requiring Nintendo Switch Online10.07%
21O. Duel minigames (Mario Party series)10.07%
21O. F.L.U.D.D. (SMS)10.07%
21O. Fluzzard (SMG2)10.07%
21O. Jumping10.07%
21O. Non-standard Game Overs (Paper Mario series)10.07%
21O. Permanently losing shiny stars on save file (NSMBW)10.07%
21O. Playing as Jimmy T. (WW:GIT!)10.07%
21O. Shared lives in multiplayer10.07%
21O. Spending coins to change dominant hand (MG:WT)10.07%
21O. Spinning Bowser with the d-pad (SM64DS)10.07%
21O. Swimming (3D platformers)10.07%
21O. Triple jumping (SM64)10.07%
21O. Unlocking secret worlds (SMB:TLL)10.07%
21O. Yoshi (SMS)10.07%
Total Votes: 1472
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is Koops with F10 - Most Shameless Business Decision!
 

Koops

Agony
Pronouns
He/They
MarioWiki
ManKoops
... ...

...

Zzz... meow... zzz... please... o... ... --p me... I need...



: HUH?! Whu... Where am I? This isn't another one of those dungeons, is it? ... ... Don't ask. And for the record don't ask why I look like a skeleton either, it's a long story (there is no story that's just how things are).

Wait, who are you? Oh right. Every time I'm made to present something for awards, some weird metaphysical audience manifests itself in front of me... wait... AWARDS? Hold on, this ain't right... uh...

I guess they must've thrown me in here after that last stunt I pulled two years ago... Not that I blame them... wait, no, I absolutely DO bame them! ... I was right. I will not stand for this blatant repression of free speech! ... Hah... too bad for them, I have a trump card up my sleeve. Little do the buffoons know, my artist brain was particularly innovative that summer. Yessir, while all of you were busy wrapping your minds around how you were so smart and how my downfall was so delectable, I thought up my own rescue team.

It's only really a matter of setting up a connection. That part might be a doozy. But if I move around here a little, I might just find something... even though knowing them, that'd probably be playing right into their hands. But hey, if that's what it takes to get out of here, then so be it. First things first... need a light. Just need to...



: Aha! There we go!

Now to try and connect. This should be easy... Huh? What the...



: Right. This thing. Shit, that's gonna be hard to bypass... let's see here... 7H34! Do you copy?



"Yawww...-wah? The hell... who the hell calls at this h-"

: Ok, good, you can hear me... I need you to send me one of those packets.



"... What?"

... This is horrible timing isn't it... uh, take your time, I think.

"No go on. Your ass woke me up, might as well just get it over with."

You know, the packets.

"What packets."

They come in that little box. You know. Those ones.

"OH those ones! Yeah uh, I kinda lost the Super Mario 3D All-Stars copy."

Well that's not very good. Think you can get another one down the store?



"You want me... to get you a new copy of SM3DAS. In this economy. In Aoun's Lebanon."

: ... Fuck.

"Yeah, sorry boss, looks like you're gonna have to break out of the woods some other way... I'd come down there and get you one way or another out but you know how Gaston gets actin' up every Monday. Nothing I can do about that fur baby."

Great. Well, guess that means I'll just have to find stuff myself... easier said than done when it doesn't even seem like this basement or whatever it is still appears to be under construction...



: 7H34!

"What now?"

Get the toaster!

"We have a toaster?"

I'm using codenames in case we're being recorded.



"How the hell am I supposed to know what you're talking about?"

: It shouldn't take long to figure out what in there qualifies as a toaster!



"Don't look at me, you're the one who made me stupid!"

: Fair point. Alright, uh, get that rectangular thing that you put in the funny big box and then it shows up on TV.

"... ... Lightbulb?"

7H34 what do you use lightbulbs for?

"That's not important right now! Just tell it to me straight, what do you want me to look for?"

It's a game cartridge, 7H34. Game cartridge.

"OOOOOOH a game cartridge! Should've said so in the beginning, dumbass."

Oh I'M the dumbass.



"Yeah uh... problem. No cartridge."

: ... What.



"There's no cartridge anywhere."

: You didn't eat them by any chance did you.



"Sorry bro, couldn't help it. Tasted like shit, but ya can't stop a woman with an empty stomach. Especially not this one."

: You do realize those things aren't on the market anymore, right? Now I'll have to give a scalper money. I hope you realize this is your fault.



"Oh god... what have I done..."

: Well, guess we're back to square one either way. 7H34, you think you can make out where I am at all?

"What do I look like to you, a map?"

That's a no, then. Great. Oh.



: Would you look at that. A lever. Sure hope nothing bad happens when I operate it.



"Says you."

*click*





: WOAH! What just happened!



"Would you look at that. Even I could recognize this drifting anywhere..."



: What did they make this thing with, chewing gum?



"I guess so."

: This shit still happens... I can't believe it... one of those days I'm gonna be cynical enough to believe they did it on purpose to force people to pay for those repairs, I swear... dumbass corporation am I right.

"True."

...

...

: Alright, 7H34, you know what, I've had enough. I'm taking out my REAL trump card! The ace in the hole. The killing blow.



"What, putting me in that OOCC thing or whatever?"

: Even better. I was able to contact a number of fellow internet dwellers to build a network. Years of work and careful planning went into this one. If I do this just right, I'll be able to pull myself out of this place. If not, then... not. I'm just gonna hope the disguise we used to hide this network is convincing enough to deter them to rat me out.



"Oh, cool! Just hurry on over here I have one cat to contain and two other pets to baby."

: I know he's probably into it but I'm not sure that's what you should be calling your hu-- wait what.



"... Please tell me you didn't make the mistake of making this 'disguise' of yours a fucking fangame of all things."

How To Send A Cease and Desist Letter To Creditors


Of course.

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Frequent takedowns of fan content28720.03%
2Refusing to fix issues causing Joy-Con drift at point of production17412.14%
3Restricting availability of old games15911.10%
4Utilizing a 'free update' model to justify releasing games with minimal content at launch1369.49%
5Limited-time availability of Super Mario 3D All-Stars1238.58%
6Nintendo Switch Online subscription1057.33%
7Restricting availability of game soundtracks876.07%
8Requiring YouTube creators to surrender a sizeable cut of their profits845.86%
9Mario Kart Tour/Dr. Mario World gacha805.58%
10Failing to properly credit artists for music used in The Super Mario Bros. Movie584.05%
11Reselling older games at the price of modern releases553.84%
12Artificial scarcity (NES/SNES mini, certain amiibo)392.72%
13Adding advertisements to LEGO Mario voice lines292.02%
14O. Limited-time availability of Super Mario Bros. 3540.28%
15O. Closure of Nintendo 3DS and Wii U eShops30.21%
15O. Excessively harsh demands for awarded damages30.21%
17O. Allowing AlphaDream to go bankrupt10.07%
17O. Buying the rights to Super Hornio Bros.10.07%
17O. Casting Chris Pratt for The Super Mario Bros. Movie10.07%
17O. Dr. Mario World end-of-service deletion10.07%
17O. Regional locking of software10.07%
17O. Removal of the Dolphin emulator from Steam10.07%
17O. Restricting game modding10.07%
Total Votes: 1433
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is Superchao with the Fail Awards XV Closing!
 

Koopa con Carne

call me Hot Lips, 'cause i'm a one-shot wonder
MarioWiki
Koopa con Carne
Hello, everyone! There's nothing anyone hates more than stupid level gimmicks... So, naturally, I've taken the top three winners, thrown them all into a single Super Mario Maker 2 level, and uploaded it for you all to "enjoy". And if you don't have the game, don't worry! You can experience a video playthrough just below.

LEVEL CODE: D06-0LJ-B7G

Congratulations to our top three, dark / low vision levels, restrictively low timers, and autoscrolling levels!

#
Nominee
Number of votes
Percentage of votes
1Autoscrolling levels22915.56%
2Restrictively low timers18412.50%
3Dark/low vision levels1328.97%
4Cappyless/F.L.U.D.D.less missions1037.00%
5Automatic levels (SMM)966.52%
6100 Coin Stars/Shine Sprites (SM64/SMS)946.39%
7Checkpointless challenges916.18%
7Water levels916.18%
9Star Ball galaxies674.55%
10Roshambo Temples (PM:CS)634.28%
11Ghost Houses583.94%
12"Secret of _" levels (SMS)573.87%
13Blast the Fury Blocks (SM3DW+BF)493.33%
14Surfing galaxies442.99%
15Purple Coin levels372.51%
16Red Coin missions (SMS)241.63%
17Ice levels231.56%
18O. Refreshing levels (SMM)50.34%
19O. Bubble galaxies40.27%
20O. Dark/low vision water levels30.20%
21O. Cosmic Clone levels (SM3DL)20.14%
22O. "Little Timmy" levels (SMM/SMM2)10.07%
22O. Being trapped in an area until a certain plot point10.07%
22O. Blooper-surfing (SMS)10.07%
22O. Bramble levels (DKC series)10.07%
22O. Casino levels10.07%
22O. Daredevil Comet10.07%
22O. Desert levels10.07%
22O. Enemy defeating clear conditions (SMM2)10.07%
22O. Levels with little safe ground10.07%
22O. Levels with no challenge (SMM)10.07%
22O. Mazes10.07%
22O. No jumping levels (SMM)10.07%
22O. Silver Stars10.07%
22O. Time Trials (MKT)10.07%
22O. Troll levels (SMM)10.07%
22O. World 1-1 remakes (SMM)10.07%
Total Votes: 1472
results table design (c) pidgey 2015, probably

Up next is Lakituthequick with F8 - Worst Remake!
this is a great level!
 

Raiko Horikawa

Live your life according to your rhythm!
Forum Moderator
Chat Operator
Core 'Shroom Staff
Awards Committee
Pronouns
He/him
MarioWiki
Superchao
What a ride, huh, Awards readers? Can you believe we’ve got 15 years out of how bad things can be in one way or another? Here’s to next year… but first, with fail out of the way, we’ve got some positivity to end on.

And by positivity, I mean more of those wacky bonus stars we showed you! Enjoy!

Up next is Lakituthequick with Bonus Stars!
 

Lakituthequick

Celestial Guide
Core 'Shroom Staff
Awards Committee
Pronouns
He/him
AC Hubbub

AC Hubbub
My my my! These folks are amazing! You make failure look hip again! Great show, great show!
AC Hubbub
Now, let's not keep our dear audience waiting any longer! Without further ado, let's unveil the next set of Bonus Stars!

★
Best Performing New Nominee Star

AC Hubbub
Haha! The Best Performing New Nominee Star is up next! Phenomenal!
AC Hubbub
This Star goes to the nominee from any award that got the most votes out of all newly added nominees!
Pillar Panache
But to keep it fair, we only kept it to existing awards, not new ones.
AC Hubbub
Hoho! Indeed! So, one drumroll for which nominee got this Bonus Star, please!

Mario Strikers: Battle League

AC Hubbub
Mario Strikers: Battle League! Glorious!
AC Hubbub
This game scored a stunning 348 votes in F7. Most Disappointing Update Cycle, which made it the winner of that award too!
Pillar Panache
And towering over the second place. Pyrrhic victory, perhaps.
AC Hubbub
Some games have very disappointing updates over their lifetime, and this one is very clearly the Best at being Disappointing!


AC Hubbub
Now, let's dive into the flip side of the coin with our next Bonus Star!

★
Worst Performing New Nominee Star

AC Hubbub
Wow! It's Worst Performing New Nominee Star! Golly!
AC Hubbub
This Star is like the previous one, except this nominee got the least amount of votes out of all newly added nominees!
Pillar Panache
Same boat.
AC Hubbub
Now who or what will be unfortunate enough to score so low in their freshman year? Let us see it!

Coin Box

AC Hubbub
Coin Box! Dazzling!
AC Hubbub
This item scored a meagre 10 votes in M14. Favorite Mario Kart Item, putting it in last place! What a rough start!
Pillar Panache
Only one vote more than as a write-in last year. If you put that in your top three, you can already kiss your trifecta goodbye.
AC Hubbub
And that's not even an activity this year! The Worst start imaginable!


AC Hubbub

AC Hubbub
Goodness! That concludes this round of Bonus Stars! But fret not, dear audience! We'll be back one more time with more excitement and surprises! Stay tuned, for we have more in store for you!
Pillar Panache
Guh-huh!
Up next is Roserade with the Mario Awards XVII Opening!
 

Fennekin

Fox Pokemon
Pronouns
She/her
The entire Car Wash crew can't stop bopping to Zange's worst enemies song! It's so good, this dancing will never stop! Toadette's doing a waltz, Toadiko's pirouetting like a ballerina, Cream's curtsying with Cheese, Chocola, and Cinnamoroll, and Oxide's doing his little top hat dance from Nitro Kart! And the others are dancing like no one's watching! …Are they inspirited by Wiglin, Steppa, and Rhyth?! Whatever the case is, these guys won't stop dancing until the awards are over!
 
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