Mario's jobs

Wario's ass

King Bowser
Pronouns
He/him
I was bored, so I looked up how many jobs Mario has had throughout the years. Some of them are really ridiculous. I found this list.

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The fact that he once did all of this crazy *bleep* like being a vietnam soldier and NBA player makes me like him even more lol.

If you can find more, post them here.
 
how about counting his careers in the super mario bros. super show like being a rustler or moses
 
Mario must've been paid majorly, but he lost all of his money.

That explains why there are so many coins in the environment.
 
more like he spent it all at once on expensive race tracks, hosting dangerous parties, and paying his medical bills
 
Bah, some missing ones.

Grocery Store
Super Mario Bros.: Peach-hime Kyushutsu Dai Sakusen!
"Owned and managed a grocery store with brother. Assisted elderly citizen and employed Bowser and his Koopa Troopas."

Professional Boxer
Super Mario Klemp-Won-Do: Muskeln sind nicht alles!
Acquired the title of Street Fighter II grand master by defeating Zangief, Chun Li, Blanka, Dhalsim through clever means.

Circus Performer
Donkey Kong Circus
Helped train Donkey Kong for a popular act involving juggling pineapples and dodging flaming torches.

Firefighter
Super Mario no Shōbōtai
Helped prevent apartment fires by kids. Saved a mother and her baby. Instructed kids on the importance of fie safety. Repaired Jeeps as well.

Rapper
Performed an elaborate rap for the promotion of Mario Pinball Land.

also, the resume needs some work, as Mario really shouldn't be documenting his frustration with some jobs...
 
We don't talk about that around here.
 
Do not blame Mario for animal cruelty.


It was JUMPMAN who mistreated Cranky, NOT MARIO.


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I mean c'mon, Jumpman is completely different. There's no way Mario magically morphed another finger, changed the shape of his face and moustache, grew a pair of big eyes and grew an actual neck.


Jumpman isn't Mario. He may be his father, or brother, or BFF, but not him. If Peta wants to attack someone they should go after Jumpman, not Mario.
 
Saltman said:
Do not blame Mario for animal cruelty.


It was JUMPMAN who mistreated Cranky, NOT MARIO.


8bd2e359c238615b7a70ed5df241ab0310107f77_00.jpg



I mean c'mon, Jumpman is completely different. There's no way Mario magically morphed another finger, changed the shape of his face and moustache, grew a pair of big eyes and grew an actual neck.


Jumpman isn't Mario. He may be his father, or brother, or BFF, but not him. If Peta wants to attack someone they should go after Jumpman, not Mario.

I mean yeah right, why can't people see this? It's obvious! Besides, Mario has always been a series that values continuity above all else, so why would they suddenly decide to change his design anyway?
 
Saltman said:
I mean c'mon, Jumpman is completely different. There's no way Mario magically morphed another finger, changed the shape of his face and moustache, grew a pair of big eyes and grew an actual neck.
Don't underestimate the powers of surgery in Mushroom Kingdom. How else can we have a dinosaur that spits eggs and still apparently is a trans female?
 
Eh. Considering how whack natural biology can be in real life, it doesn't surprise me that such a thing exists in an even more whack fictional world.
 
It's hard to imagine a world where a surgery is able to make Mario's face so perfect.


Also Birdo is effing ugly but I don't think she ever had a surgery. He's just a guy who one day decided to put a ribbon on his head and pretend he's a girl just for fun, or something. I don't see her having any boobs or anything that may prove she had any kind of surgery (except maybe for that giant egg spitting anus mouth hole thingy in his face? even though all Birdos have that lol).


But hey, maybe Mario did use some surgery to get his Sonic mouth in Super Mario Run.
 
Saltman said:
I don't see her having any boobs or anything that may prove she had any kind of surgery (except maybe for that giant egg spitting anus mouth hole thingy in his face? even though all Birdos have that lol).
Boobs are a human thing. Why would Birdo want to have boobs? It's like you wanting a a giant horn protruding from your head to look more masculine

Maybe Mario did surgery!!
 
Sorry, man. Not to be blunt or rude or offensive but...

Weak arguments.

Also I thought we were past the "Birdo is a guy who thinks he's a girl" thing. It really complicates things for no reason.
 
Birdo is trans female. That's all.

We're on a tangent anyway. It's Mar10 day, wouldn't Mario qualify as some professional party manager?
 
He's been in enough parties, I'm sure he knows a ways past the ropes.
 
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