Mario Kart Horror Stories

Moldomré

Moldomré

Moldomré. Emphasis on the "ome" despite the "é".
MarioWiki
Moldomre
This is for all those times we've encountered those races in Mario Kart that never go well. Or where the NPCs on your team turn against you. Or where you foolishly pick Grumble Volcano on every single 200CC VS race knowing that you'll never win.

Anyone care to share some of your favorite (or least favorite) Mario Kart horror stories?

EDIT: Just to make sure, this can be used for horror stories in any game. Not just MK8/DX.
 
If the female Villager is ever on our team in balloon battles, she always seems to be out to get everyone else on our team, but never anyone on the other team. My brother had one time on the Mario Kart 8 Rainbow road where he got stuck on a spin boost pillar (It kept doing the boost animation but he didn't go anywhere) for about half a minute any subsequently lost the race, if that counts. Also, we had this stupid Tanooki Mario computer the other day that took out the rest of our team and then popped all of his own balloons within two minutes of the battle starting. He was great.
 
Nothing fresh in my mind but I'm sure if I picked up the game and had a few online races I could come back with juicier stuff.

One time I had a mushroom, tried to cut a corner on Mario Kart Stadium, hit a pipe and proceeded to shoot backwards along the nearby wall. Entirely my fault, not the fault of some other player's item luck, but it was embarrassing. Luckily it was the first lap so I could come back from it.

There's been a share of cases where I saw the blue shell on the map and tried to back up so another player would pass me and take the hit, only for it to be in vain because the other player didn't pass me in time and I only hurt myself even more. That always stings. I'll keep note of this thread next time I play Mario Kart because I'm sure I'll have some real juicy bullshit to talk about then.
 
Needing a item to defend yourself at that one critical moment where a homing item like red shell or blue shell is closing in but getting a coin instead. That seems to happen a lot in higher CC races against CPUs in MK8/MK8:D and usually when my coin count is already capped out at 10/10.

Edit: Oh and I just remembered something else, it took me years to learn that apparently there's a trick to stopping spin-outs in MK64 by slamming on both the brakes and acceleration causing a music note to appear above the characters' head. It should not have taken so long. : /
 
CPUs in Mario Kart 64

Here are what they can do:
- Catch up with you quite quickly if leading the best CPU racer
- Gain a huge lead if you fail to catch up with the best CPU racer
- Can ignore terrain while off-screen
- Recover much faster than the player when they are off-terrain (example: player falls the long way in Yoshi Valley, while CPU float away before they fall to appear on the track)
- Use items that don't match their item boxes' items (though thankfully they can't use every item, like the Blue Shell)
- Throw bananas at pinpoint accuracy (mitigated by a tendency to hit their own bananas)

Thank you for reading.
 
Any time Wario earns a single point in Mario Kart Wii, especially under my "supervision".
 
Has anyone else noticed that the female Villager in MK8/DX has bloodlust for everyone?

Also, Morton is stupid. With 1 second on the clock, he turned completely backwards and left my entire team in the jail. He of course, got caught while turning. Renegade Roundup on hard, amiright?
 
Yo said:
Has anyone else noticed that the female Villager in MK8/DX has bloodlust for everyone?
Click to expand...

I don't.

Mostly because I have bloodlust for everyone myself.
 
Yo said:
Has anyone else noticed that the female Villager in MK8/DX has bloodlust for everyone?
Click to expand...
Not really.

She feels like everyone else. Those that aren't Waluigi, Wario, Donkey Kong, Wendy, or Yoshi. Because those five are usually dead and Female Villager isn't dead.

Also seeing Mario doing poorly always bothers me for some reason.

FyQpXKr.jpg
 
I don't think I was involved into Terribelle's abysmal 8 points in that 8-race match.
 
Mario Kart 8 Nightmare: All opposing vehicle combinations use the Slick or Cyber Slick tires, while I'm the only Roller (or Azure Roller) user in the race.

Screenshot example below.

7Azc4K2.jpg
 
Russian Baby Luigi said:
I don't think I was involved into Terribelle's abysmal 8 points in that 8-race match.
Click to expand...

That's still a terrible nickname that should never be used.

Also...

Just...

Battle Mode, is a horror story all by itself, no matter the rules.
 
799px-Baby_Man_Textures.png


Baby Mario has eyes in his legs...
 
^In the same game, the back half of Daisy's neck is missing!
No pictures, though.
I notice it all the time because of my go-to team of Yoshi and Daisy.
 
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